A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Dear Agony Aunts and Uncles,Okay, i've been going through some tough things right now the biggest thing i've just accepted is my sexuality wich i'm now happy with! Well the problem thats been going on from when i was 08 until now which is 13 and well the point is im very overweight and my comfort eating is what got me to this. Ive been exercizing and eating but people in my school still bully me for my weight and my gay personality which im trying to hide which leads me to the cupboards for a king size Galaxy bar. I just gain all my weight back and now i just can't be bothered! But i want to have a 6 pack by the age of 19 so then the perfect guy would'nt dislike me for my weight! HELP!-S.V.
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female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (10 May 2010):
 Hi,
First of all, please go to your parents and tell them about the situation at school.
I know that you feel all alone and you're at an age that is especially awkward and turbulent. But, you're not. Loads of kids are going through the same sh*t you're going through... I've been there myself. I was a victim of bullying, and it sucks so much. But, you're not alone and it certainly doesn't mean you're inferior. You're NOT ugly or stupid. You don't deserve to go through this, but you must do the right thing and tell your parents, and tell the school authorities.
If you're unhappy with your weight, and you want to change it, you should change it for the RIGHT reasons- ie, for YOU. Talk to a GP about healthy eating, take up a sport. At 13, you're old enough to go to a gym. You may have to have your parents' permission but I don't see why your parents wouldn't give you their permission.
Don't change yourself just to please other people. There is NO excuse for bullying at all.
I'm sure you have a lot of really good qualities and the right guy for YOU is the guy who will be SMART ENOUGH to see all the qualities that make you special.
Don't let the bullies get you down. I'm sure that you have people who love you for who you are, and eventually the right guy will, too. It's okay to be gay... anyone who would bully another person for being gay is an idiot. Don't let them get you down!!
A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (10 May 2010):
 I think you need to see your GP and ask for help. You have got into bad eating habits because food is related to emotions for you. It is important that you take your weight problem in hand now for all sorts of health reasons rather than for attracting someone later in life. You need a special form of counselling called cognitive behavioural therapy which can help you to break the bad eating patterns (GP can refer you for help). There is no need to starve yourself or never look at a galaxy bar again - it is just a question of moderation. I would also ask the GP to run some blood tests to make sure you don't have a metabolic problem (e.g. thyroid) which may contribute to weight gain. At 13 you are old enough to speak to a doctor without taking a parent, but if you want to take someone with you for support then do so. You should also get your parents to report the bullying to the school - bullying is something that happens in a culture of silence. The school have a duty of care towards you and fellow pupils to stamp out bullying. However nothing can be done if it is not reported. If the school don't act then your parents should ask the local education authority to step in. You should not have to tolerate bullying.
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A
female
reader, Zoey_Twin2  +, writes (9 May 2010):
I would just ignore those kids bullying you and i think you need to just admit you sexuality so it wont bother you..... If you want to lose weight you got to believe that you can do it before anything happens.... I hope this helps :)) -M-
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A
male
reader, bruce lee  +, writes (9 May 2010):
 You know? When you're young, it feels like the whole world is against you sometimes.
But it's not. You need to have a laugh and forget about all these bullies.
Bullies are not worth thinking about. They want you to think about them but you don't have to.
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