A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i am 30 years old and married 4 years to the father of my 2 children.recently, ive become paranoid that he is having an affair with a young woman that works for him. (shes 18) she lives nearby and has babysat for us. shes a nice girl.i think the reason im so paranoid is because im jealous of her. think back to high school.remember the beautiful girl who had everything? you wanted to hate her but just couldnt because she was so nice? my husband looks at her with intense desire and she returns it! what do i do
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2008): Well dont hire her as a babysitter, if your saying she's returning the looks then yes, it's time to get rid of her. Why bring trouble into the house?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2008): "i think the reason im so paranoid is because im jealous of her".....
That's it babes, it's just a reaction from the past. I little human comparison, and you put yourself down for no reason at all... Pretty girls hurt too, and not all of them want to steal people's husbands. Are you sure it's intense desire, or maybe like you, he's just reacting to the memories of the past, when he wanted to be Mr.Popular and he wanted to get the pretty cheerleader girl....
You and him are married, he married you for many things, not just because you are beautiful in looks or body, these things do not last. Desire and good looks are fleeting, these things decay over time. Have more confidence in the beautiful person you are, and realise only a stupid man would throw this all away.
If you can't stand it, well no problem, your only human. Get yourself another babysitter that makes you feel more comfortable at home. These jealous feelings need to be tackled, you need to feel more secure in your marriage and your husbands love. Start dating again (with hubby) bring the magic back, do all the romantic things you used to do, tell him he's handsome, tell him nice words. Bring back the magic and make sure that his eyes and his thoughts are only on you.....
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2008): Don't have her as a babysitter. He probably isn't seeing her, but might be attracted to her, and if it bothers you, having her watch your children will most likely just cause a lot of stress.
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A
female
reader, Elisiance  +, writes (13 December 2008):
 Hi, I would not bring pretty young girls around the house...show up for lunch unexpected. Our intuition as women is very keen, don't be quick to pass it off as paranoia.
On the other hand, your hubby may be completley innocent, but make your presense known and throw them both for a loop a little bit. Hope this helps!
-Elise
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