A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey , I would appicated if anyone can give me some advices on what to do. Here's the story, I went out with her for about 3 years. The day I asked her to be my girlfriend was on my bday so it was really speical to me. She was my first girlfriend and I'm her first boyfriend, we started dating really young at the age of 16. After 3 years she broke up with me because I did a lot of bad things to hurt her. I never cheated on her but I lied a lot to her, one of the reason is because I guess I need to space in the relationship and I was afriad to tell her. I later on told her that I was sorry and I would make it up to her, but this relationship meant a lot to her and the fact that I lied she just couldn't take it anymore. I gave her some time to think it over than one night she called me and want to break up with me. During that phone call she was crying on the phone and I know she still love me but she feel like it's something she has to do. After that night I tried to contact her every possible way I can but she just avoided me. So it's been one year now since the break up. I also found out that she has a bf now. I feel terrible inside and regret everything that I did to hurt her so bad. Ever since the break up I been feeling so lonely and I can't sleep at night. What Im trying to say is that I'm living with this guilt, all I wanted to do is apolize to her. It doesn't matter if shed forgive me or not, it would meant a lit if I could let her know that I am truly sorry. Deep down her heart I know she hurts me a lot. My feelings towards her is still the same since the day I meet her, and I will always love her. I guess what I'm trying to say is all I want now is for her to be happy with or without me cause her has been through a lot of tough times. any suggestion on what I should do in this position?
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female
reader, christina12345 +, writes (7 February 2009):
Well i dont really know excally what to say to you. But at least you are admitting that you did wrong, most guys these days wont admit to that. And if you still have strong feelings for her and she just moves on like that, thats pretty messed up on her part, THREE YEARS? and shes moved on, i dont see how in the world she did all that. im sorry to hear about this, im only in highschool so i couldnt really say much. but i agree with that other person, i would just tell her how you feel for the last time and if she doesnt want to accept your apoligy, then i would just leave the situation alone for a while, and maybe she will come to her sences and realize.
A
female
reader, Tigerlily +, writes (7 February 2009):
If you want to apologize, then write her a letter telling her how you feel. I went out with a guy once for 3 1/2 years. He didn't listen and ignored everything I said until I became too hurt and exhausted to continue. After we broke up, he finally thought about everything I said. Seems to be that way with guys. They don't think about it until it's over. In any case, we talked a lot about a year after we broke up. He sent me a letter apologizing and telling me what he'd come to understand after the time reflecting and how sorry he was he hurt me. It actually really meant a lot.
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