A
male
age
30-35,
*r.kid
writes:So I have been with my girlfriend for a little over three years and she has lost alot of intimacy. I will be happy if we can steady have sex once a week but she always has am excuse. I find myself bagging for it and that's pathetic. What I'm asking is why would she lose so much intrest and almost avoid me from kissing her and touching her hoping it will lead to other things?
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female
reader, R1  +, writes (31 January 2013):
 Relationships often aren't the same after some time. People put less effort in. If you want sex, work for it! Romance her, charm her, remind her why she fell in love with you. Women need excitement and stimulation not a cuddle in front of the tele. I'm sure you've got it in you so go for it!
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (31 January 2013):
 if kissing and hugging always leads to sex and my drive is less than my partner's I'm going to avoid kissing and hugging because I don't always want sex.
if kissing and hugging are not always a prelude to sex (as it is in my house) then there is a lot of kissing cuddling and hugging... and minimal sex... so we fix that on our own as needed...
has she had things going on (school/work/kids/family issues) that are taking a lot of her time and attention?
has she started new hormonal birth control or other medications?
you use the term intimacy to mean sex correct?
do you actually have intimacy? (NOT sex which is not the same thing)
Intimacy for me is about sitting on the couch cuddled up watching a tv show and talking.... that's INTIMATE I would not do it with friends.... I may watch TV with them but not cuddled up...
I may talk to my friends but my intimate friends I talk to about important things.
Have you asked her?
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