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Out of nowhere he tells me that he's going to date this girl, that he loves her more then he ever loved me and he's completely positive that he's going to marry her. Um..what just happened?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Crushes, Dating, The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (2 May 2013) 4 Answers - (Newest, 3 May 2013)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I started talking to an ex again about 5 months back. We'd been talking and it seemed like things were headed back toward a relationship. (Yay, because this was the one guy that I could actually see any future with). Then out of no where he tells me that he's going to date this girl, that he loves her more then he ever loved me and he's completely positive that he's going to marry her. Um..what just happened? Is he really that serious about this girl after only apparently knowing her for a few weeks? Should I just let the relationship run it's course and wait it out? Also, he stopped talking to me completely, though he still talks to his other ex-girlfriends. He's even in a band with one of them. So what's the deal? Is he still into me? If he doesn't want to be with me, why stop talking to me?

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (3 May 2013):

Honeypie agony auntI'm sorry I think he kept you around in case she turned him down. Sorta like a rebound relationship.

I would let him go and NOT talk to him again and I CERTAINLY wouldn't see him or date him ever again.

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A female reader, oldbag United Kingdom +, writes (3 May 2013):

oldbag agony auntHi

What he has done is tell you in no uncertain terms there is nothing ever going to happen between you two. He is now seeing the woman of his dreams (apparently) and is not even talking to you.

Why would you wait for a man who tells you he is with a woman he loves way more than he ever loved you?

Gain some self respect here, forget him.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2013):

"Um..what just happened?"

You've been dumped.

"Is he really that serious about this girl after only apparently knowing her for a few weeks?"

What difference does it make? He dumped you.

"Should I just let the relationship run it's course and wait it out?"

Only if you want to spend the rest of your life waiting for a guy who's never coming back.

"Also, he stopped talking to me completely, though he still talks to his other ex-girlfriends. He's even in a band with one of them. So what's the deal?"

You've been dumped.

"Is he still into me?"

Apparently not, otherwise he wouldn't have dumped you.

"If he doesn't want to be with me, why stop talking to me?"

I suspect he knew he couldn't just dump you without you demanding an explanation and badgering him with inane questions. Actively ignoring you is a much easier way (for him) to make his point emphatically.

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (2 May 2013):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntI suggest that you forget him and move on with your life. EVEN if he should "return" to you and claim that he's come to his senses (that's how we guys couch these things in terms that make us sound honorable!).... he REALLY is still quite a child, and is prepared to keep you hanging if/when he wishes....and without regard to your feelings......

Good luck....

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