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male
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anonymous
writes: Me and my girlfrined have been 2gether for nearly 3 years we have had are ups and downs but laitly we have had little problems that have turned into big problems know she wants a break from me i wanted one to but know i regret it deeply i know its because she wants to see more of her friends and im scared if she does shell become unfaithful and i dont want that obviously what shall i do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2006): I think you should agree with what kind of break you both want. I mean, if you are just taking a break, then neither of you should be with anyone else. It sounds like that to me, she just wants some time away from the relationship to think.Sometimes a break can be the best thing for a relationship, if she has feelings for you, she'll miss you terribly and she won't be interested in any one else. She'll enjoy being with her friends, but she will miss not having you around.If you are having big problems and she wants a break, I would respect that and agree to it. I'd let her go, and have faith that she will come back. If it's meant to be, she will.Good luck. Whilst on your break, perhaps you could concentrate on doing other things too, such as seeing friends etc. You can then both think about your relationship more clearly and hopefully meet back up with renewed feelings.
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reader, DrPsych  +, writes (27 April 2006):
 However painful, you cannot control your girlfriend or speculate what she might do when she is out with her mates. Ultimately if someone wants to cheat they will find a way - whether with you or on a break. Try to figure out what is wrong with your relationship - you should both do that - and evaluate the relationship in a few weeks time when you have both had chance to cool off and think. You should particularly try to work out if you are feeling stressed now because you are going to be without her, or without a partner per se. Lots of people mistake being lonely for being in love with someone.
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