A
female
age
41-50,
*ixieGwen
writes:I've posted before.. but i cant seem to relax.. im constantly thinking. I realized when guys are sick theyre big babies (well some). I'm used to being needed when a bf is sick but because my bf has his mom nearby/her friends to get him things.. he doesnt need me. As far as i know hes not really taking anything (its prob prolonging the cold). He hadnt called all for 3 days and i called and we talked and he seemed fine and normal.. just tired. I realized today that the last time we hung out (the day he got sick) we got in argument because he was being a smart ass with me. I told him if i talked to him that way he wouldnt like it.After that he changed his tune and was back to being lovey dovey. I also said we probably shouldnt talk when we're sick/not feeling well.. cos hes snippy and im extra sensitive. Which might explain why he hadnt called.. but im not sure if he remembered that(although when asked what i just said.. he actually knows). During this week hes done things that make me wonder - Deleting his facebook profile (that he rarely used), deleting himself from gmail chat(last time we talked he said he wasnt online and said it mustve been his mom - they share a computer) and the next day he was gone from the chat. I started to panic and assume he wants to break up.. from the lack of calls, the deleting of things online and then I think "well if he wanted to break up, hed write an email, say something over the phone, completely ignore my calls or when talking to me - be short and eager to get off the phone". Normally we talk every day or every other day.. so it was a change for me not to hear from him.He's been consistent with calling almost every day the whole time we've been dating (over a month), plus he had wanted to meet my mom and friends - which he did, talked about moving in together (if we lived together....) and this last wknd we had a blast and the next day he got sick.Anyhow i think all these things and i try to rationalize. its hard for me to just relax and say.. if he says he wants to break up or says there is something wrong.. then i should worry..
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female
reader, PixieGwen +, writes (1 August 2010):
PixieGwen is verified as being by the original poster of the question i hardly call him to begin w/ ..he normally calls me and hes been sick since last sunday. we talked sunday (he sounded fine with me/ just sick).. i called monday (to see how he was feeling/no answer)..and then called thursday - he claims he didnt know i called monday.he was normal though..he didnt seemed bothered by me calling and didnt rush me off the phone. hes still sick and happens to have his kids this wknd.. so i plan to call him monday because hes been house hunting ..and i found a house he might like.. other than that..i dont call much lol
i guess everything is fine w/ us.. although i worry..cos well i worry alot.. and i keep thinking the worst. damn its hard to push those thoughts out of my head.
A
female
reader, PixieGwen +, writes (1 August 2010):
PixieGwen is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for replying - oddly enough i love taking care of people when theyre sick..well mainly a significant other (i was a caregiver for 6 yrs.. im done now lol).. but yeah i like it.. so i know i should be happy he doesnt need me..but i guess i like being needed haha.
but youre right i should take everything lightly..the stuff thats been said/done when sick..and relax.. until hes well again :)
i have a habit of worrying..so if you have any pointers on ways to not worry..let me know.. aside from keeping myself busy..because that doesnt seem to work.. lol
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (1 August 2010):
 If he's sick, he may just want quiet. It depends on how much you bother him with daily drama - sometimes the excuse to ignore it is a blessing, even in great relationships.
If he wants to break up, most guys I know will either tell you straight up or just be rude until you dump them. If he's ignoring you while he's sick, you're probably safe.
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (1 August 2010):
 I hate having to look after sick people! I can't understand why anyone would want to be a nurse (God bless you, you wonderful people) when my hubby is sick I get grumpy at him for being such a wuss. If I were you I'd be glad that his mother is around to look after the big baby for you.
We are all horrible when we are sick and we say things we don't mean. (I get really irritated with people trying to talk to me when I'm sick.) So I wouldn't read too much into anything that's been said or done while he's been sick. There's a reason why it's termed not being yourself when you are sick.
Relax take some deep breaths, read a good book, let him do the chasing when he's well again.
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