A
male
age
30-35,
*Bongs
writes:I was online dating with some beautiful woman on some social network, we had wonderfull time chatting to each other, I told her that I like what I'm doing with her, and she is really pretty, in the long run I became attached to her, we talked about everything including our privacy.. she told me she had a boyfriend, but her relationship didn't have the spark, her boyfriend wasn't spending time with her. then she became bored and lonely(which was probably the reason why she wanted someone else). I told her how I feel and she said the feeling is mutual. unfortunately for us we couldn't have a chance to meet. then when the times go by we considered each as lovers, and in some way as couples, but not until yesterday when she said she had sex with the "her boyfriend" who could spend time with her. she wasn't even sorry about that when I told her that I feel betrayed by her actions and asked her if she cared about me, and if I mean anything to her when she does those kind of things with her man, and then she said its up to me to decide, then I deleted her because I was angry. but now I feel that I have made a mistake and should have asked her for answers. I am still in love with her. What should I do?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2012):
I will speak to this issue having been there. It seems some of the others have not.
I have met women online that I felt a connection with and then later met them. Sometimes it did not work out, but sometimes it did. I wouldn't be so harsh as to say: "It's all virtual, she will never meet you, and what you feel is all a lie."
At least once, the woman I met had a boyfriend and, like you, she told me she slept with him. Like you, I got a bit jealous. However, I realized that she had been upfront about it. I think her telling you that might be a way to clear her conscience and also see how you might react.
I would push on her to meet up to see how much of this is in your head and how much is real.
A
male
reader, DBongs +, writes (13 March 2012):
DBongs is verified as being by the original poster of the questionPoint taken, thank you for all your response. I've learned my mistake
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2012): Okay, you are in love with the idea of this person, not the real person, who you really have no idea is who she says she is, anymore than you are who you say you are....seriously, get off of your butt and go out and meet a real person that you can have a real relationship with, not a pretend hiding behind a computer screen one...this girl told you she had a boyfriend...she's been secretly having these computer conversations with you, so basically she is keeping something from him....not a trustworthy person and obviously not in a stable relationship if she is going to the internet communicating with strangers. Deleteing her was the right thing to do....and hopefully you can learn something from this...
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A
female
reader, Basschick  +, writes (11 March 2012):
 A real, live relationship will win everytime over a virtual one. Sorry, but the only way you could have made this work was to be with her in the flesh, day to day, going to lunch, hanging out at night, eating dinner, going shopping, watching movies. You cannot expect an on line relationship to come to fruitation when there's a live man knocking on her door every night. You learned a valuable lesson the hard way. I wish you the best.
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A
female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (11 March 2012):
 What answers do you need. She has a boyfriend already, your just some guy on the internet who she will probably never meet. If she is unhappy with her boyfriend, she will leave him and get another boyfriend who lives near her, who she can kiss, talk to and go out with.
To her your just a guy she talks online to, she's not in love, she's not ever going to see you and she probably doesn't even notice that you've deleted her.
Please find a girlfriend who lives near to you, who you can kiss and touch and talk to, face-to-face. You talk about love, but you don't know this woman at all. People can say lots of stuff on the internet, it doesn't mean any of it is real.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2012): You knew she had a boyfriend and still you went ahead and fell in love with her. I think she was lonely and needed someone to talk to. Having a relationship online is safe because we can say things we wouldn't normally say to someone's face. It becomes easier to fantasise about the other person and build up a relationship in our mind. The reality is that she had a boyfriend and rightly or wrongly she got involved in an online relationship with you. Part of me thinks that she didn't have to tell you that she had slept with her boyfriend and she could have carried on stringing you along. Another part of me thinks she did the right thing by telling you. I don't think she really cares what you think or feel because she just chatted to you and gained comfort from knowing you were there for her when her boyfriend wasn't. I wouldn't contact her again. You will only end up getting more hurt.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2012): I think you took this virtual relationship too much seriously. First of all, you said you can not meet, who wants to be with someone that they'll never meet in the futur? Secondly, she was with another one during this and you were aware of that, and her being with you while she's not single means cheating. She was cheating on her boyfriend and from that thought you should have considered that this girl is not faithful and may not be faithful to you in the futur. And finally, I guess she was just bored and wanted some fun or wanted to forget about her problems with her man so she USED you to have fun and forget everything. And trust me, it is impossible to love somebody on the internet withouth meeting in real life, and you can never trust somebody in th e internet. People can lie and pretend to be somebody that they're not in real life. People sometimes need to hide. and she thought you were doing the same way that's why she didnt care about you. Advice: forget about her, I just gave a bunch of good reasons that all of this doesnt deserve your time or your attention!
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