A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:okay so i walk home everyday with two beautiful girls who are thought were friends or something but apparently they really dont like each other and basically one is kinda oblivious to how awesome she is so when the other one is there she kind of goes all quiet and jsut lets the other one outrageusly flirt with me ( with i dont exactly hate)but when its just me and her shes like the perfect girl she really funny and cute but shes only like this when the other ones not there and the other ones really nice but shes kind of a flirt and you dont really know where you stand with her, anyway what should I do?
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male
reader, stateside  +, writes (16 October 2011):
If a girl likes you and you have spent time with them alone, they would have let you know how they feel. There would have been hints, plans, phone calls, excuses, ect. Does either girl ever drop by? Any phone calls, emails, facebook topix, any personal thoughts from either girl to you. DO NOT PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE by asking one out, your a young teen and it's too easy to fail. Instead, make plans, **afternoon walks, let the girls aways talk and ask them lots of question about things they like ( friends, clothes, parent problems ) . Remember things about them in their life, their style, birthdays, their hobbies. Let them both know how cool they are and your luckly to have both of them in your life. It is always important to remember that pretty girls have pretty girl friends. If you ask one out and strike out, the other will also just to keep from looking bad. Remember that girls network and talk, whatever you say will be used against you. Hopefully, the girl you really like will like you and give you a sign. But if you already know both girls pretty well, I would think that would have already happened. ** It's important to stay in both girls lives, anything that you can think of that the girls want to do, do it! Mall, movies, phone calls, homework help, just playing around after school. Ask them how to approach girls. Ask them questions that you would find helpful in the dating future. What you do not want to do is mess up, knowing your headed into High School soon, it's just not worth the chance.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2011): This is very, very common. Girl A (A for Awesome) doesn't know it because in her life she's never been made to feel awesome. She feels like a "lesser girl." This means she has lower self-esteem, and feels threatened and less of a person due to it. These are very difficult feelings for a girl to overcome.
Girl B (B for bad girl) thinks she's hot stuff! In her life she's been made to believe she is awesome, more so than other people. She knows that she can flirt and boys like that, and give her attention. But at the same time, she doesn't know how to just be a girl. She thinks being sexy is the most important thing. On top of it, she needs to prove she's got your attention to girl A. This girl is most likely a toxic friend. She is probably part of why girl A doesn't feel so great about herself.
I was girl A and I had a "best friend" who was a girl B. All the boys I liked stopped noticing me once girl B came around. She stole all my boyfriends. She would call me ugly, fat, and stupid. I could not compete with her, and it took me years to figure it out that this was bad. (Like 5 years.)
So here is my advice... Sure, girl B flirts with you. But is she flirting with you because you're you or because you're a boy? Secondly, is she flirting with you because she knows you turn away from girl A and pay attention to her? That flirting is most likely fake.
If you like girl A more, then go for her.
Use your physical self to show preference. When walking home put girl A between you and girl B. When you're alone with girl A, tell her how you feel. I bet she likes you, too but it too shy and worried about girl B. Take a chance. :) You won't know unless you tell her.
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