A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I've been having a strange issue for the past few months, and I'm wondering if Im bipolar. Sometimes I feel I really need to break up with my boyfriend,and other days I feel I cant live without him.These "need to break up" feelings can turn to a kind of panic in general, which can last 10-15 minutes. If I work hard to calm myself down, I will be completely fine again after that time is up. I have noticed these episodes get worse when Im tired or upset.This can't be normal, and the constant up/down emotionally is exhausting for me. These attacks can also be triggered by other things, but generally by my boyfriend, because he's a focal point to me.Im not sure what to do about this. I am stable and content by outward appearances, and this issue is really confusing me...I am thinking breaking up with him wont fix the problem.Advice? Sorry this was long. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (31 August 2011):
 Honestly I would go and see your doctor about this. Panic attacks are a real thing and scary to deal with by yourself. Your doctor will be able to help I'm sure. Also I think you should talk to your family about it. A problem shared is a problem halved.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2011): I'm pretty sure this isn't normal either. Is your boyfriend abusive? Because when people are in abusive relationships, the abuse messes with their minds. And since you said these events are triggered by your bf...
"These attacks can also be triggered by other things, but generally by my boyfriend, because he's a focal point to me."
Maybe the problem is that your bf is a "focal point" to you. If your world revolves around him and/or the relationship, this is not healthy. Again, if your bf is abusive, then he may be making you make him the center of your universe (abusive people often do that to their partners). If he's not abusive - physically, verbally, emotionally - and still your world revolves around him and the relationship, then that's something you need to change within yourself to be more balanced. And maybe once you do that, then you won't get these panic attacks about him because then he's not such a big issue to you no matter what he does or doesn't do.
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