A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Now, to get real help - I must speak the utter truth. So here goes...This all started at a missionary homecoming party (you don't need to know what this is - it's just basically a non-drinking non-smoking etc party) And one of my friends had just returned from a two year mission on traveling the world (which meant mainly england haha). And I met two guys there, both very talented musicians, very good with the piano playing classical music, and both of them very good singers with great senses of humor. So, I got chatting, and we sat together in a corner of the gathering hall to talk and altogether eat and enjoy ourselves. I really liked their company, and my twin did too (call her J, and the two men R and V). We went into the other hall which had a piano in it and both started playing and J and I were singing and having a great time!Ok, so I was leaning against the piano and R taps my shoulder (which...I'm not sure why but came as a very big shock) to get my attention and start talking about how he travels to Japan to study.Basically, I am sixteen, and I'd like to think myself as mature.... but as you agony aunts don't actually know me that counts as very little... and, I really do love this man, R, I don't know whether it's true love, or just a love between great, great friends - but I do know that I love the way he talks, I love the way he likes my hair, and how we have the same tastes in music, politics, language and..... X-Box games. But it's the little things that count - these are just a few things that inspire me about him (does that make sense?) He is the reason I look forward to going home every day, and he is the reason why I can't concentrate at school (thats bad I know but...yeah) and he makes me laugh so hard I think to myself "what would I do without him?"....is this question TRULY like all the others? Is this REAL love? Love can't be explained in a few paragraphs I know, and if you need more information then ask me - I'll be happy to give you more info, after all - I want you to help me. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou know, I really do appreciate your advice. What exactly is infatuation? Is it when you find someone amazing? I've never heard the term before.
I'm going to be honest, and say that at first (PLEASE don't judge me too harshly) I thought R was a bit ugly, weird - and I didn't like him one bit. But he was persistent and we talked online a lot, and I grew so attatched to his personality that when I saw his face on the webcam it was different - I saw immense handsomness!! hahahah :#) . There is another thing I would appreciate help with:
His best friend V said he wanted to date me when I turned eighteen, and I don't know what to say...because, well it's two years away. I don't know whether I will even still know him by that time! Or R for that matter. And what would R do if he knew about this? Do you think I could be in trouble? I don't think he's the jealous type...but people are capable of suprises, even ones you've known for half a year. Sigh, of course - I also haven't told you that R has said that he likes me (as in "likes" me). He confessed while we were joking around with a can of beans (quite literally) Why did they have to do this now?! When I have high levels of hormones pumping through me isn't the best time to be sending signals is it?! Ugh, but I can't help it. So..we haven't talked in a while, about a week. Oh and this might seem random but is "cute" a good thing?
Thanks again,
Kate
A
male
reader, bharat mehta  +, writes (20 January 2010):
 It is your teen age. It is mixture of some childhood, and some youth. You laugh so easily for someone who caught your attention, and you in response wanted to be the center of his attention.
See, love is different thing, then liking. In first place I can say, you like this person for certain reason. There is no question of love involved at first place. There is a vast difference between feeling and liking. It is good, if you take some help from your elders, like father, mother, elders etc.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2010): It certainly sounds like the roots of love, but love is what takes place after infatuation goes away :)
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (20 January 2010):
 A socially correct explanation of real love is committment, loyalty, companionship, tolerance of differences after a long period of living together.
But what you are feeling right now is very real to you. You being young does not undermine the feeling you have. Your kind of love is very maiden-like, very innocent, open, yearning kind of love.
Some people actually say that real love is in the mid teens because it is so pure. It is the kind of love that inspires poets.
And now you are not preoccupied by college, or career. Mature love can sometimes be tainted with greed, love of money and power.
You may get the impression that what you are feeling is not real because it really takes time to get to know a person.
What's real to you is real. People always look outside of themselves to find love. But what's inside is just as real.
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