A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been in love with my best friend in the whole world for almost two and a half years now. I've never loved anyone so much and I've fallen hard. He is all I think about and because he's my best friend I can't just cut off all contact with him. However, I also can't tell him how I feel for fear of losing him then aswell. We've kissed and he tells me he loves me but only when he's been drinking. We both agree that we connect on so many levels and are closer then we ever thought possible. I love having him as my best mate but being in love with him and not getting anything back is breaking my heart. I don't know how much more I can take. I'm so torn and just don't know what to do. Any advice on what I should do to try and solve this situation?
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (13 June 2011):
 Your only options is to tell him or get over him. If you want to get over him you need to take time away from him, which can be heartbreaking in itself. This means you need to stay away from him for as long as it takes for your feelings for him to fade away, and for you to be able to develop these same feelings for someone else.
In other words, you will have to let him go. He will wonder why. And you should be honest with him and tell him why, and also tell him that you want to continue to be his friend once you have gotten over him.
Alternatively you tell him and hope for the best, that he feels the same way. But a relationship can ruin the friendship you have, and in the end you might have to take time away from him if the two of you break up. And this time it will be even harder, as there are even more emotions involved.
You must decide what is more important to you. Him as a friend, or him as a boyfriend.
If you do get together as a couple, and then break up, you might still be friends, but it will be a hard journey, as things will never be the same again.
Personally, I think love is worth the risk. I'd go for it and risk it all. It's better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.
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