A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:hi my name is bill i havent dated in over 10 years cause i realy dont know how annymore see i have aw metal illness i been fighting depresson anxiety for the most of my life when i was young i belivei had it to cause i was so shy hand very hard time with friends school going to paties wow chicken out like always wow scared thats why i dont ask or try to find a date life like this is like a prison
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2022): You need a good therapist to help you become the sort of man a woman would want to date and fall in love with. Women don't choose men out of pity or because he longs to feel better or is lonely, there has to be something equally important in it for them too. Would you date you if you were a popular, young, gorgeous woman? No you would not. You need to work on yourself with professional help to become dateable. No different to expecting a terrific well paid job when you have no skills or qualifications, and many others who have what it takes are applying too. Unless you are happy to date a woman who is very ugly, maybe much older, maybe with all sorts of problems and baggage that is how it is.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2022): When you have trouble getting dates; you have to practice opening yourself up to people, by working on your social skills.
Judging from your spelling, I don't believe English is your first language. You may have placed an American flag above your post; but I don't believe you were born an American, but that doesn't matter. If you are able to take night classes to improve on your grammar and writing skills; you'll also improve on your ability to communicate and express yourself. Take life one step at a time. You didn't mention your age, I'll guess you're in your 20's or early 30's.
Anxiety and depression isn't what's isolating you; it's probably your lack of social skills and probably a learning disability. When it's hard for people to communicate with you, they're standoffish; especially women who have to always be on-guard about the kind of men they socialize or come in close-contact with. If you're not managing your mental-health issues properly, or not taking prescription medication according to your doctor's instructions (and the reading the label), you won't receive the full benefit of your meds. Your body will not adjust properly to your prescription, thus rendering your medication ineffective. Irregular use of prescribed medication also makes the medication ineffective; even when taken according their prescribed dosage. You have to commit to it, and you have to do it continuously. Same goes for your therapy sessions. You have to show-up, talk to your doctor, and tell him or her exactly what you've shared with us. If you were seeing a doctor as you should; you'd probably have no reason to come to this site.
If you're not making regular visits to your mental-health specialist for scheduled therapy, you can't manage your depression or anxiety all on your own. Hence, your behavior is erratic and people (especially females), don't feel safe or comfortable around you. You don't feel comfortable around women, for fear they won't understand you; or aren't able to deal with your mental disorder. You still need friends, you still need affection, and human contact.
I'm grasping for straws here, I don't know you; but I think because you're not managing your mental-health properly, your behavior is driving people away from you.
If you don't have a healthcare plan, and you are in fact an American citizen; you should seek assistance for affordable healthcare. You need to seek an adult education program to help you; if you have trouble with English, spelling, and writing. You will gain more confidence, you will be around other people who have things in common with you, and you can work on your social skills.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (2 September 2022):
 Are you seeing someone? Like a counselor?
Maybe you should start there?
If you think you have depression or anxiety - it could be that you need help to overcome them, help that you can't give yourself.
I'd say seek out your doctor and get a referral to a therapist/counselor.
If what you have tried to do for the last 10 years isn't working, TRY something new. Maybe that IS therapy.
Maybe it's going to the gym, joining a sport, find a hobby.
There is a difference between being shy and isolating oneself.
Do it for YOU.
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