A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been dating this man for about 2 months now. He saw me makeup-less yesterday and raved about it. I HATE NOT WEARING MAKE UP. He caught me in very good light and my hair looked amazing, but this is rarely the case. It's not what I'm most comfortable with but I would like to try to embrace it, since he made sure to go out of his way to tell me. But I'm not sure how Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2009): My first boyfriend hated me wearing makeup. The reason? Because it made me look more attractive. He was incredibly insecure and tried to control the way I looked, acted and thought. He trained me pretty good too til I gained the courage to leave. He ended up being a very controlling person, shown in many other ways but the makeup thing was a very small indication from the start. I'm definately not saying this is the same in your case, I am playing devils advocate and offering a differing point of view to those that everybody else is laying out. Not everybody has good intentions. But yours might :) He also might just know about YOUR insecurities and want to make you feel better. Basically your body is YOUR body. Do what makes you feel good. He met you wearing makeup, he loved you wearing makeup...now he wants you to change?!
A
male
reader, daletom +, writes (8 May 2009):
The fact is that many - perhaps even the majority - of guys prefer girls with little or no makeup.
I really like your comment:
"It's not what I'm most comfortable with but I would like to try to embrace it, since he made sure to go out of his way to tell me . . ." It sounds like you are aware of another person, and what pleases him, and honestly willing to please him. It's a step away from self-centered, what's-in-it-for-me thinking and toward the "us-thinking" that I believe characterizes good marriages.
I wish I had a good answer for your request, ". . . But I'm not sure how.". At its core, you are trying to undo a couple decades of conditioning, socialization, and brain-washing that has been laid on you by Hollywood, Madison Avenue, and the glamour industry. This change will probably be difficult and won't happen overnight. It's part of the process of learning who you REALLY are, and "being yourself". Although I can't offer good advice, I CAN offer my admiration and encouragement as you pursue this goal.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2009): He likes you for what you are - not necessarily for what you try to be.
Just think ahead a bit. If you ever end up living with or marrying this guy - or anyone else for that matter - he's going to see you first thing in the morning, hair all over the place, bags under your eyes, with morning breath and no makeup. He'll also be under the misapprehension that your poo smells of roses until you come out of the toilet and he follows after.
Do you really want to give him the shock of his life the morning after your first night together? Better he knows what he's letting himself in for long before that, and if he still wants you more than ever you can bet your boots he loves you to pieces - warts and all!
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (7 May 2009):
 Tastes change. I for one am bloody glad those horrible plucked eyebrows are gone.
Claws belong on cats, not women. Even coloring I can do without. In short, I am a sucker for what is called the natural look.
Natural look does apparently not mean no make-up. You can still smooth things out, or accentuate them or whatever. Just don't overdo it and realize that at your age your natural skin might easily be beautiful enough. Leave the clows-makeup for when you are in an old folkshome.
Oh and use the cash saved to do something fun instead. I thought razors for men were expensive and then I saw my gf's facial scrub prices... no wonder men are supposed to pay for dinner.
Another reaoson some men prefer the natural look might be because they link it to an active fun girl rather then some fashion doll.
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A
female
reader, baybee-x-sparkii  +, writes (7 May 2009):
 Why dont you try lightening your make up (say not wearing foundation and instead concealer or a lighter eyeshadow) and experiment a bit and find what you and then he likes?
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A
female
reader, niki20 +, writes (7 May 2009):
 guys love natural make up. use a powder as close to ypur color as possible. use mascara and a little bit of eyeliner on the outter bottom lid. a sheer gloss and maybe a little blush and bam your done. or even just powder and mascara. that always looks cute.
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A
male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (7 May 2009):
 Ah have you ever seen the Seinfeld episode where they are celebrating Festivus and Jerry has been dating Gwen the "Two Face" who looks great in dim lights but when the lights shine on her everyone at some point in the show goes:YAMA HAMA!Sorry, I am trying to be somewhat humorous here.Do you think you might simply be self conscious because you are so used to wearing makeup?You shouldn't be down on yourself. You said your hair looked amazing?Just give it a try. If you find you just cant stand it, no harm no foul. I think I should let you know that we men actually do like women that have no make up. For many times it truly allows their natural beauty to come through. I bet your man saw your radiance and went banannas.Good feeling huh?
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