A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Um....hi im having serious boyfreind troubles and i need some serious help! I know this guy and he was my best guy freind and i really liked him and than my freind got us to start dating and now i dont like him infact i cant stand him hes so ugly, and a jerk ,and not funny and i just hate him !!!! but awww hes so cute,nice,and funny and i love him so as you can see i ahve mixed feelings like a love bipolar so i really dont know what to do my freinds say to break up with him and i think i will but i dont know how to do that without hurting him because im his first girlfreind and its only been about not even a week, he came over my house and my freind hates him and i think im in love with this other person and as you see i need serious serios advice Help ive never broken up with someone befor and i need help!!! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2009): It sounds like you like the guy more as a friend than as a lover. And you regret that you started dating him. You need to tell him how you feel. And there is no guarantee that you won't hurt his feelings or end your friendship with him. Just take it as a life experience and move on with your life. When you meet the right guy you won't have any doubts.
A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (19 January 2009):
 Hey,
If you don't want to be with him I suggest asking yourself if you still want to be his friend? If yes then be prepared for a possible hard time (depending on how he feels). You could very well lose him as a friend if you do this wrong, but this is the way to maintain that friendship and keep him:
Firstly, tell him that you want to be his friend, if you do this then you need to "maintain" it by giving him 'constant communication'. Now here's the problem: He will likley still like you a lot and "hope" you will come back to him someday.
To over come this I suggest that you sit him down have a good long chat with him about you both. Tell him that you have thought long and hard about you and him and that you still really like him a lot - but only as a friend (be sure you rehiterate it and "mean it" if you say you want to be his friend!!!). Then make an agreement with him that you both will need some time apart to overcome the dating and promise to meet up and see each other again in say six months. (and when you meet promise to mot talk about you both in that way or you'll have to take another six months away to clear his mind) This time will give you both a fair amount of time to let go of each others feelings in that way. And you will start to miss each others friendship by this time.
After the six months meet each other for a coffee or a smoothy or what ever you like to do and be friends again.
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If you want to be with him then, just be with him. Any way who's giving you the impression hes so ugly, and a jerk ,and not funny and hate him. your friends or you?
I wish you the best, and let us know how you go :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2009): At 18-21, you should have the emotional maturity to be able to adequately function in the dating world without allowing friends to talk you into dating, someone so impulsively..especially a guy, that you say you hate and then say you love! C'mon, girl....you need to be more mature and definitive than that. We are talking about the feelings of another human being here. If you can't be more clear in what you want, then you aren't ready to date anyone. Break it off with him, today! Give this poor guy a nice send off and then you need to work on your dating attitude by being a more independant, more wiser young lady. It will come with time, but please do not date this other guy until you know for certain what you want out of dating. Because the way you are going right now, you stand to hurt a lot of people with your impulsiveness and lack of clarity. Work on that first, enjoy life as a single girl and learn about discernment and making good choices in your dating life.
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A
female
reader, Ms.wayne +, writes (19 January 2009):
I think you need to give us some more info on why you want to break up with him, and only after a week? what did he do? Well if you do decide to break up with him, you need to do it as soon as possible before anymore time goes by and anybody gets more attached. Just be upfront with him and let him know that maybe you just are not really ready for a relationship right now...(but don't let him know you have these feelings for this other person.) And then maybe tell him you two can go back to being friends. Good luck
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A
female
reader, PunkyPippi +, writes (19 January 2009):
 Let that be a lesson to you--- don't EVER let your friends talk you into doing something.
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