A
female
age
30-35,
*reamcatcherx1
writes:I have never been popular but I do have a small group of friends, probably about 7 or 8 people, and we are all really close. For a while now, they have all been becoming friends with this other girl. This girl is really gorgeous and gets a ton of attention, especially from the guys and she could get any guy she wanted. She has a very outgoing, loud and flirty personality and has a ton of friends. She has sent out naked pictures to the guys and they are always giving her sexual attention too. She is always saying how much she wants to sleep with these guys.Her and I are just complete opposites, I'm not really all that pretty and I don't have many friends and I'm not nearly as popular as this girl. I really don't think this is jealousy because I'm not a jealous person, but I'm sad that she gets so much more attention than me. It's like my friends prefer her over me. Me and her just don't really click at all and I guess that's why we aren't really friends because she doesn't seem interested at all to become my friend.I feel as if I almost have to compete with her, and I hate feeling like I'm in some kind of competition. I just want my friends to continue to be my friend and like me, but I feel like they're all slipping away and are more into this other girl. What do you think I should do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2013): Why do you feel she is displacing you rather than displacing any other member of your group? Do you think maybe your other friends feel like you do and feel she is displacing them?
I'm just curious why you think or perceive that it is you she is displacing in particular. Could it be that you're too anxious or feel insecure to begin with even before she entered the picture? In other words are you really being displaced or do you just interepret things that way because you have a predisposition to think insecurely?
If your other friends want to hang out with her and you don't that's fine. There is no rule that says you must be friends with your friend's friends. If your friends start ditching you in favor of her then they were not your real friends to begin with. Real friends continue to be interested in you even if they have made other new friends.
A
female
reader, lostlizzie  +, writes (2 May 2013):
 Stick with the group, wait it out. Once this new girl gets the title of a slut people won't want to be around her. A good thing to do would be to talk to the member of your friend group that you are closest to. Tell her how you feel. You never know, they might feel the same about it. Good luck :)
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (1 May 2013):
 Believe me.... she will - ultimately - "tip her hand" as to who she is and what she is all about.....
THEN, you - and your high standards - will make YOU stand out... and YOU will be high on the list of preferred young women in your "group".....
Be patient, and....
Good luck...
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