A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hello!!!im 18 and im seeing this guy... neither of us want a serious relationship but he never tells me how he feels about me or even if he finds me attractive...we live together so things can get awkward but we've been ok, and its been going on for about 6 months!!! how can i find out what he really wants from me? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Cag Lee "Apollo" Adarma +, writes (22 April 2007):
 Hey hey
well unfourtunately for you, there is no such thing as a 'casual' relationship for women. as a gender you are loving and gentle and the very heart of you wishes to be loved ( that is to be cared for and entrusted with anothers respect, fears, hopes and compassion).
A man wants all these things, but he also has a sex drive FIVE TIMES that of a womans. Coupled with his very visual nature ( and male socialisation) this leaves them at odds with their feelings if there feelings aren't placed in a structured context i.e a formal relationship.
So he will not think to tell you those things if you have said that its not serious, he will enjoy the relations and the bravado of sex without strings. What you want from him is the rhetoric of care and love which you have you said you didn;t want from him. Obviously you do.
The decision now is to ask yourself do you want to impose a relationship ( in asking how he feels about you etc) on a guy who obviously would get into a relationship with you if coaxed but won't by his on volition, or
do you want to call it quits before you get hurt and look for a proper relationship?
The choice is yours
PEACE AND GOD BLESS
The Capt
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