A
female
age
36-40,
*Lindy87
writes:Hey, I live with my father and I'm beginning to see how needy he has become. I go to college and he's been a great help to me right now. I don't have to pay rent, he bought me a car, a new phone, pays for food, bus fair, etc. He really is great in that aspect. He's also a really loving guy, however I am finding that he's overbearingly needy.for example, I understand that I clean because I don't pay rent, thats fair. However, he'll wake me up at midnight to make him an ice cream sundae, yell for me to come out to the living room to get a remote thats a foot away from him, to get him a glass of water or make him food while he knows I'm extremely busy with homework. Is it totally spoiled of me to get upset that he does those things? I'm totally okay with doing the dishes, cleaning up both of our messes, etc to make up for the free place to live Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (20 September 2010):
 Something doesn't ring as right in your relationship with him.
It sounds like he is over stepping what you would consider normal bounds. I know that as a parent I tend to have trouble adjusting to new roles as my children age. He may be trying to hold on to the past a bit much.
I would say that he is providing well for you and genuinely enjoys your company. What he hasn't realized is that you need to be more independent from him in order to continue growing into a self sufficient adult.
On the other hand it appears that he is not getting enough companionship in his life. He would be better off in the long run to find someone who is not going to be flying away in the next few years. But he may not feel safe or ready to start that search.
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