A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My mom wont talk to me about sex. today i asked her over 30 times about different thing but she just walks away from me and tells me not to follow her and to leave her alone. so i have no other choice but to ask the people on this site. So here is my question i hurd that a girl can only get pregnant one day of the month. i wanted to know more about it and how to know what what that day would be for me. not that i want to get pregnant i just want to know... i do wish my mom would talk to me about this stuff with me but she wont. i kinda also wanted to know how i can tell my boyfriend that im not ready for sex. i want to tell him that im not ready to be a mom so im not having sex but i dont want to sound stupid. i would like to know anything you have to say but if u could please not answer rude because i get that a lot on here thanks
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female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (6 March 2010):
Hi there
My first pregnancy occurred about a day after my period which is supposed to be the safest time. There is no completely safe time to have sex and avoid pregnancy. Your highest risk is roughly half way between your periods.
As for how to say no to sex, just tell your boyfriend that if he cared about you he would wait. Darling, most girls who have sex always regret it. Don't be forced to do it. Your time will come. If you are feeling aroused you can masturbate by reading a racy novel and learn to please yourself. Most guys under 21 are driven by their high levels of testosterone in their bodies to seek out sex. Most of them will do or say anything to get it including tell you they love you, tell you they are yours forever and some can even cry to show you how strong their feelings are for you. When you give in, the only thing that happens is that they get to boast to their friends in explicit detail about what you did together. They don't have the maturity to respect you. This comes with age when their hormones start to be more controllable and they are more mature. I don't know how many girls I have heard say they regretted it. The guy will sleep with the girl then dump her soon after, or he will do it for a few months then dump her after that because he now wants to try out other girls. However, if you are ever going to do it anyway, I encourage you to make sure that you use some form of contraception like condoms together with the pill. Go to www.plannedparenthood.org to learn about contraception and to http://teensource.org/pages/ to get information on how to say No and other information about pregnancy and contraception. I hope for you that you respect yourself and not just choose to be used as a garbage can for him to dump his sperm in. All you will be doing is building his ego on your back. So respect yourself. If you lose him because of it at least he won't go around telling the whole world what your vagina looks like. There are plenty of guys who would love to date you if you respect yourself more.
As for your mum. Ask her to buy you a book about sex and stuff. There are many; "What's Happening to Me" by Peter Mayle is the one I gave my daughter and you can order it online on Amazon.com.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2010): We girls take a lot of time to be comfortable about sex. But most of us know when we don't it. It does not matter what you say to him - he may laugh at your arguments or it may sound trivial even to you - but you do know that don't want to do it. Our body is usually ahead of our minds.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (6 March 2010):
 Today with the internet and Google, you can ask anything and get more info's online. It is like a big library.
Just go online and key in your key phrases in Google search window i.e, pregnancy, periods, conceptions etc . You don't have to ask anyone and they may give you the wrong information's.
There are no safe days from getting pregnant.Everyday is a risk.
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A
female
reader, KayK87  +, writes (6 March 2010):
Im sorry your mom is acting that way. It could be she is not ready to talk to you about sex. But I do want you to know you can get pregnant any time you have sex, there are days you are more fertile Im not sure how to figure out when you are most fertile but if you google it they have sites that can tell you. Also The best way to tell your boyfriend you are not ready is to straight up tell him exactly how you feel. If he cares about you he will understand.
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A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (6 March 2010):
 Good for you for asking, and ever better for being firm with your boyfriend!
For starters, knowing when you might become pregnant helps, but it's not a substitute for condoms and other birth control.
If your cycle is regular, that is, if your period comes every 28 days or thereabouts, your body releases an egg around the midpoint, around 14 days from the end of your period. That's when the risk is the highest. But you can't count on knowing that to keep you safe -- his sperm can live in your body for up to a week, so there's quite a lot of time for the sperm and the egg to meet, in which case you get pregnant.
I'm very sorry that your mom isn't helping. The best thing you can do is to say NO to your boyfriend, and abstain from sex -- that's the only sure way to not get pregnant. If *you* decide that you want to go further, if *you* choose to have intercourse, then you must insist that he wears a condom, and you should use another form of birth control to be safe. The pill, contraceptive foam, or something else.
If you're not 100% sure you're ready, say no and mean it!
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