A
female
age
36-40,
*pica100
writes:My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. We also have lived together for 8 months currently in a one bedroom apartment. Whenever we get into a small argument, he never wants to talk about. He gets up goes to the bedroom and gets dressed, At least five times during our relationship he runs out of the apartment, and goes to his parents.The problem is whenever he starts to get dressed, I beg him to stay and talk, I hold onto his arms, stand in the doorway. This has happened a total of five times in our relationship. Last Saturday, I asked him to use the internet cable for my laptop, ( I needed to apply for jobs ) but he was downloading music files. He told me to use the computer downloading music, I said no since my resumes and cover letters where on the laptop. He finally gave me the internet cable and the slient treatment. I poked him and said come on lets talk about it. He kept on saying no. So it happened he went to the bedroom, and said he was leaving to go to his parents. I followed after him, begging him not to go, blocking the doorway, crying alot. Then he said its over. However the next day we spoke on the phone, the he said he needed a break, and that it would last one week. So I spent New Years without him, the rent is due Jan 1 its his turn to pay it. He told me he would come yesterday at 8pm to pay it. He never showed up, he put his facebook status to single. We never spoke about the terms of this break, besides give it a week. I feel so lonely and in limbo.
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female
reader, Jmo  +, writes (2 January 2009):
 First of all, it seems as though the two of you were not ready to live together. The way that he gets so upset by little things and runs to mommy and daddy, and the fact that you have to hold on to his arms and block the doorway, shows that your relationship lacks emotional maturity. Maybe you both have realized that living together wasn't as good as you thought it would be. Maybe you thought it would be easier. Maybe he's just a momma's boy. Whatever. As it is, you have no say in the matter regarding you taking a break. However he took on the adult responsibility of signing a lease and agreeing to contribute to rent, and he has to face the consequences of that decision regardless of whether or not he wants to be with you. Have you called him and asked him where the hell rent was after he didn't show up? Is there any way you could get a hold of his parents in an attempt to collect rent? Hopefully, you can manage to figure something out. In the meantime, maybe (even if you get back together) you should discuss the idea of not living together because it seems like things were better before you did (otherwise you wouldn't have made the decision to do so). Just a thought.
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