A
female
age
26-29,
*eartbroken princess
writes:i am 13 and in 7th grade. how do i get boys in my grade (in my school) to like me as a friend and then maybe date me later on in life? but i don't know how!cause honestly i tried flirting, being nice i tried the best i could but now i need some help. thee main problem isever since 1st 2nd grade boys have made fun of me they say "i look ugly, my clothes don't match, ect. i've only had 1 boyfriend in my entire life and i would love to have more.but no boys expect 2 like me but only as friends (expect one but i don't like him like that)i only like them as friends(maybebut he has a girlfriend)can someone please help me cause i really need some help? i don,t know how to get boys to like me!
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female
reader, xTheAlmightyDuckx  +, writes (30 November 2011):
 Goodness gracious you sound just like me when i was 13.
I am almost 15 years old and like you back when i was about twelve maybe 13 i really wanted a boyfriend and i would get into such a state when i tryed as hard as i could to get boys to like me and they just didn't seem intrested.
Unfortunely love and dating is really all about waiting, and i know at your age it seems really hard just because it looks like everyone around you has that someone special and you don't.
But i can say that all that love and stuff isn't all it is cracked up to be. And even though you probably get tired of people telling you that your not old enough to start a proper relationship it is true.
How many of your friends do you know that are your age and have a boyfriend who they have been with longer than a year? I am sure there isn't many simply because you aren't mature enough to kind of understand what love is.
Also it doesn't sound like you have much confidence, so maybe you should take your mind off boys for abit and just focus on how you can increase your confidence and be happy about the way you look and the way you act as i can tell the more confident you are the easier it is to attract people, but that it something that comes with age.
As for the boys who are calling you ugly, hold your head up high and don't be ashamed. There are just imature children and let what they say go over your head even if its hard.
If you want friends who are boys then you should try just waiting untill meet a boy who you really connect with and let the friendship happen on its own instead of trying to make it happen.
It works the same with dating and love you can't force it to happen it really just comes to you as you get older and when the time is right.
Don't be disheartned as sometomes as i have been there it feels like your never gonna find love but it isn't true! Have hope in yourself and you just gotta wait good luck xx
A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (30 November 2011):
 It really is too early to be fixated on this.
The things that will bring the boys to you are the things that ensure you look relaxed and happy and at peace with who you are.
Concentrate on the fundamentals and the essentials (that you think are essential right now) will start to blossom into young love in perhaps a couple of years.
Your current age is really difficult, for all of us.
Your beauty is emerging but still forming.
find pictures of some well known beauties in the world today and you will find that at 13, 14 and even 15 they looked gangly and not as attractive as they do now.
The fundamentals are:
Get enough sleep every day.
Make time for contemplation/meditation/ just relaxing your mind time by closing your eyes, and clear your mind of stress.
Eat healthy meals. Reduce your reliance on sugar. Make sure fresh fruit and vegetables feature in your meals every day.
Don't skimp on your calcium intake (yoghurt/cottage cheese/feta/skim milk powder - the latter has more calcium than fresh milk.)
Lack of calcium at your age leads to those raised up humps that old ladies (who never ate enough calcium) end up having. And the same old ladies are more likely to break their bones in their later years. Calcium really matters.
brush your teeth twice a day at least.
Shower every day. Wash your hair regularly
Never touch illicit drugs (they end up with terrible skin)
drink enough water every day.
Find ways to exercise every day.
Read regularly and widely.
Take an interest in reading newspaper stories.
develop some hobbies.
Do as many things as possible to improve your own BELIEF in you, and your self esteem.
Be positive. It really does make difference to your life
Let the boys "cut their teeth" on the girls who are willing to the the practice girl friends. These relationships with boys less than 15 rarely last long. And nor should teens this young get too serious.
By the time the nice boys are ready to consider a hotter, fitter, more well read nice girl, then the boys will look around for just such a girl. By that time you will be closer to 15/16. And the boys will wonder how they missed seeing you earlier.
But it takes time to create the perfect girl friend. It does not happen over-night, but it will happen if you are willing to be patient.
You are not less if you do not have a boyfriend in your age group. often their school work suffers. And these are important years. Do well now and other opportunities will open up for you. But waste this time running after boys who will appreciate you just long enough until they are sick of you (never takes very long when boys are still sampling all that is on offer) means that you lose on all counts.
Concentrate you you and reap the rewards later.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (30 November 2011):
 Am sorry honey but you cannot make any one in this world like you. Maybe the boys in your class are just not mature enough to want a girlfriend. You are still very young, so just enjoy your youth and have fun with the friends that you already have. Don't try and grow up to fast or worry that you are missing out on something, you have plenty of time when you are older for boys, just enjoy your youth for now, and just be friendly and yourself. If these boys don't like you for who you are then it is there loss.
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