A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey.This is concerning my partner, who I love very much, we've been together for a year and 2 months. Basically, she went to a guys house a few weeks ago, didnt tell me, I found out and overreacted. Now she thinks I dont trust her, and I really do, I just freaked out, its totally natural! We've talked about it, and she says we're 'ok', but I know that 'ok' means we arent, haha!I'll be seeing her on Valentines Day next (I've not seen her for 2 weeks now, but that doesnt really worry me, we're both busy people and we talk everyday, even before all this happened)The main thing thats worrying me is she hasnt told me she loves me since this has happened, before this happened, she used to tell me most days, now nothing! I've said it to her, but to no reply.How can I show my girlfriend that I trust her and how can I make it better? I'm gonna get her some nice presents for v-day, and maybe we'll go for a meal or something.Any help and suggestions would be great! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (8 February 2009):
 To be honest, you shouldnt be the one trying to make things up to her. You had every right to be uspet with her...she went round to a guys house without telling you! She's almost asking for you not to trust her and it is a typical young girl thing to do to turn it back on you and say "you dont trust me" and then get mad.
I used to do that to my boyfriends when I was 17/18 and it is a clear sign of immaturity. She went behind your back - you dont know what went on in his house! If they were alone together and she claims nothing happened then either this man she went to see is gay or she's lying.
Ask yourself this; would you go round to another girls house and not tell your girlfriend? If the answer is "i'd never do that" then I'm afraid you feel more for her than she does for you. And if the answer is "I see no problem in doing that" then fair enough, you should be trying to make it up to your girlfriend.
But I think you are being taken for a ride here, you are being a bit of a doormat and falling into the typical trap where she was in the wrong but managed to turn it around to make you look like the bad guy.
If you are still adamant that you want to make it up to her then good luck to you but she doesnt deserve you.
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