A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am married and 47 years old and have owned my own professional business for 16 years. For years I managed the stress and anxiety of running my own business by relaxing with a few drinks at the end of each busy day. Over the years my drinking progessed to the point where I was drinking 2 bottles of wine and about 500 ml of Vodka each night. My drinking never affected my work or family life. I have always done everything I was required to do and more.Back in January, my wife asked me to think about cutting down my drinking and she pointed out that the amount of alcohol I was consuming was way too excessive. One night after drinking 2 bottles of wine and 750 ml of Absolut vodka, I did not feel at all buzzed. My tolerance for alcohol greatly concerned me so I agreed that I had a problem and decided to make a clean break and stop drinking altogether, cold turkey. I was concerned that I would have difficulty stopping since I REALLY enjoyed relaxing with a good wine or beer each day.I stopped drinking in the beginning of February and haven't had a drink since. I mean I just stopped without any DT's or anything. It has been more than 2 months and I have no withdrawl symptons or severe cravings. I miss having a glass of wine, but I don't crave alcohol. I feel better, but I miss enjoying a good glass of wine. My wife said that I was/am an alcoholic regardless of my ability to stop drinking, but I think otherwise. How could I be an alcoholic if I could just stop drinking as much as I was consuming each day without any ill effects? Please settle this disagreement between my wife and me.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2010): Thank you all for your feedback. I appreciate the responses and questions. To answer Tisha-1's question, I am in very good shape for my age. I am 6 ft. 3 inches tall and weigh 225 lbs. I am well toned and not flabby. I eat very healthy foods with a lot of vegetables and fruits and do not eat fried foods or fast food. I am rarely sick, for I go years without getting a cold. I have never smoked in my life and never did any drugs (other than alcohol). In fact I don't use any pain killers and never got bad hangovers from drinking. Sometimes a dull headache that would go away after a few hours the next day, but never so bad that I ever had to stay in bed.My doctor always reports that my annual physical is good too. I still play sports and work hard and exercise on weekends. I cannot sit still.What concerned me most was my ancestry. I am from German, Irish and English ancestry. Alcoholism is in my family line on both parent's sides. My father did not drink, but my mother was an alcoholic and heavy smoker, until she died of emphysema in 2007. My sister drinks too much and makes an ass of herself at family gatherings. My wife said I do not embarrass myself when I drink. Believe me she would tell me if I did.I just expected there to be a problem with just suddenly stopping that's all. I mean... I drank more than a case of wine per week, plus I have a kegorator full of beer on tap and a liquor cabinet full of premium spirits that I would run through like water. I hear about celebrities checking themselves into clinics for alcohol abuse and just figured that I would be a mess if I stopped drinking. I did not want to ruin my business and bankrupt my family if I had to leave work and go to a clinic. But then one day I just decided to stop and after that day I felt fine, and the next day came and went and so on. It has now been 2 months since I had a drink and I don't have the urge to drink at all anymore. In fact, I still have wine and liquor at home and haven't touched any of that or gone near it.I just don't know how I was able to just stop without any negative consequences like you see on television and the movies. On some level that concerns me more than the amount I was consuming. Perhaps my body is genetically pre-disposed to processing alcohol.I guess deep down I decided that I needed to stop, while I could still do it on my own.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2010): Just to pick up on what q1605 said ...
I had a friend who, before rehab, didn't acknowledge an issue. But even being in a good-sized room with him for a few minutes, the air changed. Whether you feel drunk or not, that alcohol is processed out of your body through your lungs, and the room ends up smelling of it.
You're from the U.S., so you might be familiar with a politician by the name of Estes Kefauver. The reporters who followed his presidential campaign knew him from Sen-Sen -- that was the breath mint of choice in the 50s. Considered to be a great man, a great legislator -- but those close to him knew he drank too much. A functioning alcoholic?
Personally I chewed cloves. But nothing can really cover it up for more than a short time.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (6 April 2010):
 What if the word was "problem drinker" instead? Would that make you feel better? I think it's semantics now, and I expect the argument centers around whether or not you can start to enjoy that glass of wine again. Just to cut the stress.
I'm really curious about your weight. You've been taking in somewhere around 1600 extra calories per day for years. I'm assuming you are eating as well. If you weren't eating but were replacing meals with alcohol then they aren't extra calories, but nutritionally, they are crap. What kind of physical shape are you in?
What has replaced the non-buzz (as you reported) of alcohol as a stress-reducer?
I'd say you were a functioning alcoholic. Get back to us in a year of not having 2 bottles of wine and a half liter of vodka and let us know what you think then.
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A
female
reader, metchemimi20 +, writes (5 April 2010):
 Okayy well my opinion.?
You are not, or anywhere near an alcoholic buddy.
But I understand why your wife would think that I mean gosh, I would definetley think that too. I mean that big of a load of alcohol a night?
You had a clean break, never got sucked in any type of "Drunk", I guess your tolerance level for alcohol is up the walls. You shouldnt feel the need to quit drinking, but please lay low so your wife doesnt get all pissy.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2010): Dear man
first thing is ur wife is right. All she wants from heart is that u leave wine and that is all and she will give logic less reasons for the same nobble and right objective.
so forget asking question here,, just leave the wine and do the business. I am also a business owner but i am teetotaler.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2010): What matters here is if you are drinking so much that it makes your wife uncomfortable. You are her life-partner and if it is a problem for her, it should be a problem for you. It sounds like things are going well, if you actually have no symptoms.
I think it was great of you to listen to your wife and make a change since it was important to her.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2010): I think most people would reflexively say 'yes, you're an alcoholic.' Personally, given that you were able to quit cold turkey with so little difficulty, I'd say it's not that cut and dried.
I do find it interesting that you weren't even getting a buzz. I drink that much, and get a serious buzz and get gaps in my memory. However, everyone's different. (And by the way, I certainly acknowledge that *I* have a problem).
If you've proven that you don't *need* the alcohol, the next question is 'why so much?' Usually people increase the amount they drink because they need more to get a buzz. Why consume all that otherwise?
Regardless of anything else, that volume of drinking will have long-term health consequences -- on your liver, kidneys, brain, etc. And it concerns your wife. So IMHO the label doesn't matter. You might be someone who could enjoy a glass or two of wine, but your prior level of consumption simply isn't a good idea.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2010): Wow. You drank that much and just stopped??!! I dont know how you did that. Judging by the amount you drank I would say you are alcholoc, but dosnt that mean you are addicted and cant just stop like that?
I dont know. that is a tough question. It dosnt sound like you were an alcoholoc since you just stopped when you wanted. But damn you drank more in 1 day than me in a week and i thoght I drink too much!
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