A
male
age
36-40,
*elgo
writes:I'm 26, my wife's 26 also . we spend 3 years togetherLast night she said to me she had something to confess. I listened as she aadmitted to me she love some one a 65 -year-old man and that it was basically just she is crazy about him, and that 5he said she also kissed...........she said he told her about his life every thing and she love him too much but another side she said she love me but she is not happy with me she is going to crazy dont know what to do also..................She accused me of not being in the mood for love when she wanted it, but every time I wanted it, she said no. There was nothing to suggest she was having an affair - not one thing that got me suspicious.I just can't get my head round it. Why would a 26-year-old woman want to love crazy about a 65year-old man?I found out this man is a living alone and have the same job of textile desingning making leather bags- they work togerther a well-known person also. and one who's 46 years her senior!I do love her, and don't want to divorce her, but she seems to want to leave me for him, the way her behaviour is recently - ignoring me, refusing sex, dressing slobbishly etc, ranting all the time - makes me wonder if she's having a breakdown.No matter how I try to resolve these issues in our marriage, my wife doesn't want to work on them.I feel disgusted by the whole thing, it gives me the creeps, but where should I go next with this?belgo
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male
reader, belgo +, writes (17 November 2011):
belgo is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks alot for ur replies but we talk again about this and i cleared everything she said she is trash now i reply i am able to take you from the trash she is just only impressed by him thats all the old man need to to have some for his paasion how i let her for her black future she is nice insted of this old man if she would chosse the same age of her i would let ler but 65 years man just using her nothig else em trying to bring her back its really really hard for i am affriad for to lose her pray for me please
A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (17 November 2011):
 If you love her you'll let her go!
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (17 November 2011):
 I'm not sure I get this but are you saying that if she loved a man closer to her age you would let her go to him?
so what does his age have to do with it? why is the fact that he's 65 the ONLY issue?
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A
male
reader, belgo +, writes (17 November 2011):
belgo is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks alot for ur replies but we talk again about this and i cleared everything she said she is trash now i reply i am able to take you from the trash she is just only impressed by him thats all the old man need to to have some for his paasion how i let her for her black future she is nice insted of this old man if she would chosse the same age of her i would let ler but 65 years man just using her nothig else em trying to bring her back its really really hard for i am affriad for to lose her pray for me please
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A
female
reader, chickpea2011 +, writes (17 November 2011):
 Hi,
You already have many responses, and unfortunately I have to agree with everybody here. Your marriage is over! She said to you in words, and actions. I know it's hard, painful, but she has already moved on. Do what's best for you, and do the same. It's time to be strong, accept what's happening, do what's best for you.
Good luck
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A
female
reader, Trinklett  +, writes (17 November 2011):
 Absolutely ridiculous! At 26 how could she love a 65 year old man. Thing is, she's not 'in love' with him, but maybe getting the sort of attention she's been craving for from him and also he's doing it for her in the sexual department as well. You've said yourself there were times you weren't available for her and vice versa, well she was getting it elsewhere. Its so unbelievable, but its happening. Be a man, move on and try to understand your future partner.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2011): is she sure it's love, and not just infatuation ?. personally, i can't see things lasting very long if they do get together, due to the enormous age difference...
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (16 November 2011):
I agree with Aunt Honesty.. she's clearly telling you in words and actions that the marriage is over.
I'm so sorry...
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (16 November 2011):
 Am afraid you need to let her go. She has made it clear that she is in love with someone else, if she was happy with you well then she never would have cheated on you. I know that this must be hard to accept and get your head around, but it looks like your marriage is over and you need to move on. All the best.
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