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My wife is bi-curious and has talked about a threesome then never does anything about it! What is she thinking?

Tagged as: Cheating, Gay relationships, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 May 2018) 6 Answers - (Newest, 16 May 2018)
A male United Kingdom age 41-50, *rewalan writes:

Over the years it has been obvious my wife is bi-Curious, she came home one night and told me she kissed another girl, I thought wow tell me more.. she said it was just messing around and we laughed and I though cool .. nothing got mentioned again then a few years later the girl she kissed was at this party and in a conversation she said to my wife in front of me .. we had a good snog the other night..

I didn't think anything of it but my wife looked terrifie and panicked then tried denying it in front of this girl .. Anyway i couldn't understand why the cover up..

Years later me and the wife having a drink mentions a threesome and that she would like the idea of another girl to join us ..

I'm like ok... what's the rules ?

I'm not aloud to tough the other girl

That's fine by me .. basically I just go along with it, not once have I ever brought it up .. but when she's drunk every other week with me she mentions the same thing ..

I said once when we was sober .. why do you bring the ffm up when drunk she just says ... I don't know it will never happen.. I'm like why do you only say it when drunk??

What's she thinking ?

View related questions: drunk, threesome

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2018):

why is no one bringing up the fact she's kissed other people? I wonder if she's all protective because something more has happened without you knowing.

Regardless of the fantasy side of things, this is a woman who is a couple of steps away from cheating on you, if she hasn't already.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2018):

So possibly she is interested in Women just like you seem to be ! That should have zero bearing o. You other than whether to continue the marriage or not . You need to talk to her about whether she wants to remain with you and faithful to your marriage or divorce and pursue a life with women

In other words , you need to get this fantasy in YOUR ahead about bringing other women into the marital bedroom ( because although she had it YOU are showing that you also have it too ) out of your heading yoh want other women sexually , do the right thing and end the marriage , just as she should .

Perhaps you two need to go to counselling to decide if yoh yeant commitment with one another or aex with other women instead

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A male reader, Drewalan United Kingdom +, writes (14 May 2018):

Drewalan is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks guys ... just to clarify .. I never bring it up it's her that does ... the facted she's already kissed a girl again and tried to cover it up upsets me.. why she mentions it drunk and not sober is the question ... I asked her once sober and because it was no.. that's good enough for me and I won't pressure her

So what is she thinking?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2018):

You're being tested as to whether YOU want another woman in the bedroom and so far your showing every sign you do !

Any wife with a brain uses this cue as part of the information. That her husband is interested in other women and starts planning her getaway

You have been warned . Walk this path and you seal your fate as a divorced man

Fantasy is one thing . Inviting another woman into the bedroo. Is completely another . Why would you even entertain the idea of another woman if you truly love the one your with . Perhaps you should reconsider whether you want to be married

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom +, writes (14 May 2018):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntFirstly, you need to learn the difference between actually WANTING something and FANTASISING about it.

Secondly, you need to listen and take note when your wife says "it will never happen" - unless you care for her that little that you are prepared to use her as porn fodder for your own gratification.

Thirdly, remind your wife she is married and, whether it is male or female, should not be going around snogging other people.

Carry on down this road and you may not have a marriage to worry about at all.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (14 May 2018):

Honeypie agony auntYou wife likes the fantasy and she is TRYING to get you to say, I DON'T want to share you. And you just don't seem to catch on.

You think you will be part of some porn like 3-some if you agree to this? Think again.

YOUR wife is ASKING you permission to cheat on you WHILE you watch.

Being bi-sexual doesn't mean she can't control herself or stay faithful.

Are you so focused on this that you are willing to gamble your marriage? What if she PREFERS women after the 3-some? That she rather BE with a woman? What then?

Adding MORE people to a marriage (or relationship) bed is MORE than likely going to ruin your marriage. Just look at the other posts here on DC on what can happen.

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