A
male
age
41-50,
*onjon
writes:I am married, my wife has recently told me about her fantasies with another woman, and she has been sexually active with her. We have a very honest marriage and I appreciate this. I said I don’t mind and still don’t the, hole thing turns me on and my wife knows this.My wife says I could watch some time and maybe participate. While this is great for us – my wife says she will only love me and I am here man forever, my question is how should or could I handle this I don’t want to say no to her that will just be wrong or selfish. We plan to have kids in a few years do you think we could handle this. I feel a bit jealous but I am okay with it. Please some advice?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2008): I'm sorry to say this, but as someone who has "been there, done that" with regards to this issue and who knows four other women and two men who have been in this situation, you can kiss your marriage goodbye within two years unless you both get marriage counseling, and quick. I don't mean where just one of you goes at a time, I mean joint counseling. In my case, I wasn't ok with it at all and she left for the woman, only to come running back months later--and was SURPRISED that I wouldn't take her lying, cheating ass back. Some women go lez, some go bi, some go back to straight, but in my experience, ALL marriages end.
I believe that the media has pushed bisexuality into popular society with such a positive spin that many people want to try it like people wanted to try drugs in the 60s and 70s. The truth is, just like drugs, it ruins lives and just isn't worth it. Some people are just gay, and that's ok, but if you get married, you are obligated to stay 100% faithful to that partner.
As for your comment about children, I plead with you, for the sake of your unborn kids, DON'T have kids with this women, at least not until you have resolved this issue and have given it at least five years. Don't put them through the hell of a divorce by bringing children into a situation that has a VERY high probability of ending in divorce.
A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (20 June 2008):
 To the anonymous, christmas, new-year and your birthday all in one.
But of course, in reality it will probably get somebody hurt. We are selfish creatures and whatever else mostly what we think of our partner is "MINE".
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2008): PS - in your position I would be feeling betrayed. I am only happy thinking of sharing my body with my partner, but we are animals after all and the persuit of pleasure at any risk is a choice for anyone to make if so inclined.
Would all of you men who think it would be Christmas like to have a threesome with another man and your partner? Am curious to know whether it is a balanced standard?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2008): I am not sure why people get married but heyho. If she sees you enjoying the other woman the reality could wreck your marriage. 80% of relationships that share like this split within 2 years. So I would say be very, very sure that your is strong enough to cope and that when she asks for another man to join you instead, you will be fine. Sauce for goose and gander after all.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2008): Whatever it is, I recommend you stop taking it.
Hallucinogenics are not good for you.
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A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta  +, writes (19 June 2008):
 "My wife has recently told me about her fantasies with another woman what do I do?"
Thank your lucky stars and or what ever god it is your worship.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2008): Sounds like every guy's fantasy and a dream for a lot of guys. I would go for it if you think that it will not cause jealousy or anger. Make sure that she can handle seeing you have sex with another womsn, not just you being OK with her having sex with another woman.
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A
male
reader, pyan  +, writes (19 June 2008):
Hi
several years ago my wife wanted to try another woman. it turned out that she had tried it with a friend and wanted me to join in.
my first thought was all my christmas had come at once. but one thing did find out was it takes a lot to handle two women. good job for toys.
if you are ok with it go for it and enjoy. lets us know how you go
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2008): She likes it, you like it. As long as you both have no trust issues and are unlikely to get jealous and angry, then go ahead, enjoy yourself with your very adventurous wife.
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl +, writes (19 June 2008):
 Okay, you say you are a bit jealous.... it seldom ever works with a third person in a marriage, and the woman your wife is having an affair with [yes, it is an affair] could cause problems in your relationship. At the moment you are probably feeling turned on with the whole idea, but what if your wife decides she prefers this woman to you eventhough she has declared her love to you, strange things happen in relationships.
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