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male
age
,
*uggler
writes: My wife and I have just split up after 8 years of marriage and 18 years of the relationship with 2 children. I recently found out that she has been having an affair. Although when I found out she told me it had only been going on for 2 weeks. She now stays with her mother although on an evening she goes down to the guys house and stays there. I'm very confused as to why she should do this, although she says she stills loves me, she isn't "in love" with me. This is something that constantly needs working on thats what marriage is about. She says she doesn't love this guy but she's still seeing him. I'm confused!!! We have always had a good relationship being not just husband and wife but best friends as well. I'm not sure what to do next really. She doesn't want a divorce and she is happy for me to carry on living in the house with kids. If you can give me any advice i'd be grateful.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2007): Listen carefully,
Your wife would not think twice about divorcing you if you cheated on her would she? So what you need to do is to cut her off, as painful as it may be.
Go out there and play the game and never make the mistake of marriage again.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (21 December 2006):
 I'll just bet she's happy with you taking care of the kids and the house while she hangs out with her lover. Sounds like the best of both worlds, probably has mom doing her laundry for her. It doesn't sound so confusing to me. I'd tell her to knock off this nonsense immediately or you are going forward with the divorce. She is way out of bounds with her behavior.
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (21 December 2006):
It sounds like your wife became bored but forgot to tell you about it. Instead of working on the situation, she strayed. She loves you because of all the times you spent together. She loves yo because of the kids and because youre probably a good guy. Unless she is specific with you about why this happened ad decides to work on it, it's her problem to deal with. She may be going through some crisis where she feels the grass might be greener elsewhere. IF she's in a good relationship with you, she'll probably be wrong. IF you really want her back, give her time to find out for herself. It will be dificult to do but that is how she willkow for sure you're worth keeping.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2006): She probably doesn't love him, she is seeing him once a week for sexual gratification(sorry if i just blurted it out)I been married 20 years,i love my husband,Im not in love with him, is a phrase i have been saying for the last 8 years.
You want her to be in love with you ,make her feel it,the excitment of new sex,or the feelings he is giving her is keeping her there.
Next time she walks in ,suprise her,meet her at the door,kiss her neck softly,slide your hands gently across her bare skin under her shirt,whisper ur hard into her ear, bite the bullet(if it not in ur character) give her somehting to think about.Don't get to pornograpy if kids there.But enough to get her thinking you can be the one to give her what she needs.
Do that a few time's,she lives at her moms ,call her up set up dinner so she has to come by the house.
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