A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello. Ugh well this is embarrassing but I'm scared. I'm 23 and me and my bf have been talking about having sex. My birthday is coming up and he said that we could do something special for dinner then go back to his apartment. And I was very over weight for a while, and got stretch marks all over my sides and stomach. well I lost all the weight but still have the stretch marks, and he's never seen them so I'm afraid what he will think. And I know he won't care..at least I think not, but I feel really...nervous. What can get rid of them? Or will he just not care. Please help. I'm really nervous.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2008): Hi wow i have the same issue, i am 24 and i have stretch marks in the same areas you do plus on my back and arms. also, like you i was over weight(i was super overweight like 221 lbs) and lost it but the scars are still there. i have been dating this really awesome guy for some time now and just yestarday we went back to my place after a nice evening and we both really want to be involved sexually with one another. however, i was so paranoid to take off my clothes b/c of the marks but he kept saying dont be so conscious your a fantastic woman no silly stretch are going to make me not interested in you or our relationship. i nearly almost cried. he said he didnt care but I DO and i told him that. However, to make a long story short after just talking and cuddling for 2 hours i just swallowed the horrible filling of what i thought would b looking gross in his eyes and took off my shirt. Honestly he really didnt care and told me to not be so self conscious b/c there just are and how much our relationship means to him. I was still filling self conscious but i got over it and this might be tmi but he kissed me every where even where the stretch marks are. he tried to show me his which of course nothing was there barely. lol i would say that if you love your boyfriend and you really want to have a sexual relationship with him without feeling unsure of it then to do it. seems like u have been together for a long time and if he is like my bf then he honestly will not care. i was in disbelief. he is with you because he really likes of loves you and its really up to you if your comfortable enough. like i said i just swallowed the horrible feeling i had in my stomach and undressed. As he said i am making way to much of an issue of out scars because they are what they are scars. I know that feeling though but its really your decision but if u feel in that moment or that in general your boyfriend is being genuine its up to you. even today i feel weird that i showed him but nothing changed accpet my realization that i was stressing myself outover stretch marksbut its stil going to take time for me to come to peace with the marks.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2008): Hey - not sure if this helps but I've just been looking on the internet for a body lotion and found loads of different brands with Cocoa Butter in - apparently this is brilliant for stretch marks and scar tissue. Maybe you could find a massage cream with it in and combine pleasure and practicality - you should never be embarassed by who you are! You have every right to be a goddess.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2008): I remember dating in my mid 30s after my divorce and I can tell you with all certainty that I would have not cared less about it. I was just very happy to have a gf who I liked and who liked me. I remember much less about how I felt in my early 20s (long time ago), but I don't think that I cared about things like that. I think that I felt the same as I did in my 30s. I doubt that he will care. He will be so excited about having sex with you that he won't even notice, and when he finally does notice he will be so happy that he has you that he will not care then either. Don't worry about it and just have a good time. Enjoy the evening and night.
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A
female
reader, Dawnie  +, writes (13 January 2008):
 I don't think your bf will care in the slightest about stretch marks. It's you he is interested in. You could try a product called Bio Oil. You just massage it into your skin.(Try doing that twice a day) When i had my children i had a few stretch marks, they were red to start with then went a silvery colour. They are barely noticeable now. You will find in time that yours will also fade.
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