A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Dear reader, For several years I have been suspicious of my wife cheating me. Recently some things have happened that truly made me believe she was cheating on me. So, I launched my own personal Investigation with the help of the Internet I picked up a few Audio recorders, cameras and a GPS device. Long story short, after 3 weeks I confirmed that she was seeing my sons Football coach on a Regular basis. I know this guy pretty well. My son has been with him for 4 years. My son is attached to this park, his friends and the coaches. What do I do? How can't have my son finding out about this. Is there a way to call the [local] Park District and have this guy transferred quietly so know one knows what happened? I get mad because I trusted him and others in his position with my family. There must be some recourse to make him stop? I just found out that he is also doing this with 2 other wives. Please help! If my son finds out, his world would be crushed!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2011): "So do I leave my kid and let this guy keep coaching?"
Are you serious?
Do you want that the creep who helped to ruin your marriage keeps doing what he wants without any consequence?
Keeping 3 affairs with married women? And more in the future?
That jerk must be exposed. He might repeat same vices but he must realize he cant be that way unpunished.
He deserves to kicked out of school. At least a good humiliation for using his job for unethical reasons.
And his mistresses must find out he is cheating on them.
Your kid needs to know the truth.
Lots of people are deceived by politicians, cult leaders, hoaxers because they are too naive.
Your kid must realize no one deserves to be in a pedestal nor blind trust.
Sooner or later he will realize hardships of live: he must be prepared for that.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2011): I posted this question. Come the first of the year, I will be filing for divorce. There is no saving the marriage. She admitted she doesn't love me and due to my hours at work I can not be everywhere for my kids. I let her know all the information I found out and she seemed shocked. However she spent last night with him and lied again and said she drank to much and fell asleep at a friends. So, I know it's over. So do I leave my kid and let this guy keep coaching? Is this really morally ok or ok in anyway for a Coach to do? I feel like giving in on everything and just walking away.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2011): I posted this. My wife knows I know all the details. Yes, her behavior concerns me. However, should a person who is employed by a Park District be able to sleep with the Mothers of the Players and not have to worry about anything at all? The blame is equal between my wife and this coach however shouldn't there be at least some type of reprimand?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2011): Your son probably won't find out. It took you secret audio recorders, cameras and GPS units to find out so unless you go telling your son, chances are he won't find out. that is if your sole purpose of trying to break up this affair is to protect your son.I think though that your objective in trying to get this man transferred to a different location is because you're naturally territorial about your wife and you see this as a quick fix to the problem. But it won't fix the problem. Even if you could get the coach transferred, that's not going to stop the affair. When two people want to be together in a certain capacity or have some kind of relationship, and they live in a free society where they are autonomous individuals, they will find a way to be together. The problem of your wife's betraying your marriage won't just go away if the other guy relocates geographically. Be a man and face the problem that is your marriage and why your wife isn't happy with you. confront your wife and the coach with your knowledge. realize that your wife is equally responsible not just the coach. She obviously was not turning him away. Your wife has huge problems with you if she feels this way about you.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (21 December 2011):
 Why is this the coach’s fault? What good would transferring him do? You seem concerned about your son’s hero worship of this coach are you not concerned about your wife’s infidelity?
Besides, once you resolve your home issues, he's still sleeping with two other women.
Advice:
Tell your wife that you know what's going on
Demand STD testing and either stop sleeping with her or demand condoms (if he's doing it with 3 women he may be doing it with more and you may in effect be sleeping with the entire football team's parents)
Decide if you want to save or end your marriage
and accept that our children get disappointed in life when their heroes fall off their pedestals.
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