A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello, my sister (who's just turned 16) has just started going out with a lad who is 24. This lad has no real interest in my sister and is clearly trying to get into her pants. He has a history of going out with many girls and having sex with them then dumping them. I have tried to tell her but she refuses to listen to me and thinks it is me simply trying to annoy her etc. I don't want to see her hurt. How can I convince her to dump him?Thank you Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2008): Im 15 and my older brother or sister lecturing me about who i should or shouldnt date would just make me more determined to go against their wishes.
the only thing you can do is wait for the damage to be done, and be there for her at the end to pick up the pieces.
only then can you give this guy a piece of your mind, then she may be grateful for that (as long as she doesnt have friends of his as friends of hers)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2008): Hi,
You will not be able to convince your sister. In life you have to learn from your own mistakes this is what makes you experienced about life matters like your concern for example. You are seeing things from an objective point of view and she is the one in it and therefore her view is different. What you have to make sure of is that you are there for her when this guy unfortunately breaks her heart if it comes to that!!! Bottom line...she needs to learn and figure things out on her own!!! It is understandable how you must feel and I completely understand your concern and outlook on this topic. My sister would react the same and so would many others!!!
Tell her that you will be there for her no matter what happens and when things may go down bad don't blow it in her face by telling her "I told you so" - it makes things worse!!!
Good luck!!
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A
male
reader, saltwater +, writes (1 September 2008):
 I think you can only do what Emily says.
Just talk to her calmly and say what you feel.
Don't try to lecture her in an "older brother" way; just talk to her calmly.
It's all you can do.
Or involve your parents.
Good luck
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (1 September 2008):
You can't unfortunately.
make one last attempt to really calmly tell her that you know for a fact this guy has a string of ex girlfriends that he left as soon as he got sex.
After that you just have to leave it up to her and be there when she gets hurt.
If she was a few months younger this guy would be a paedophile. Ask him why he can't get a girl his own age?
I'm 25 and I see 16 yearolds and they look like children to me. I think he is really dodgy for wanting to have sex with her.
Good Luck!! xx
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