A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I live with my sister in law. My husband is currently out of the country. She wants to sit all day and will not do anything to help in the house, if you ask her, she tells her mother, who in turn calls me and tells me to stop bothering her as she is still a child, she is 19.if i tell my husband he says its because i dont like his relatives. I feel like telling her to leave the house ,but i feel powerless. The mother has so much influence on my husband. My sister in law drives me nuts.i am geginning to hate her.help
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female
reader, VSAddict  +, writes (21 September 2011):
 You need to lay down some rules. It's YOUR house, not hers. If she wants to lay around all day, then she should go back home, or purchase her own house. Tell her that you would like for her to help you around the house and just because she's your husband's sister doesn't mean you'll let her get away with things. She's an adult and she needs to act like one. If you ask/tell her to do something and she calls her mother, then tell her mother that this is your house, you make the rules, and that she won't be sitting on her butt all day doing nothing. If she doesn't like that, then she can go back to her mother's because you've already did a favor for the girl by letting her live with you, food and all. And if she refuses, then I would kick her out if I were you because she should be making some contribution. Or if you're not up for that, then tell her to get a job and pay you a monthly rent or pay you for cleaning up after her, although you shouldn't have to. But require something from her. It's your house and she's just living in it, so she should be doing something. Your husband doesn't understand your point of view. This has nothing to do with liking or not liking his family. You have a job and have bills to pay. All the work cannot be put on you when you've opened your home to her and she's perfectly capable of contributing something. You shouldn't be doing all the work if she's living with you. I hope this helps.
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