A
female
age
30-35,
*ysterygirl803
writes:I'ts been a while since my sister revealed my intimate relationship with my 1st cousin, to my mom. Ever since I have been forbidden to see him, or have any type of contact with him. Although I know I can get in to much trouble and get him in trouble, we both decided to keep seeing each other secretly, after the problems. Now my sister and brother keep bothering me with this, and telling my mom, and I getting tired of it. We've talked and we decided that we want to be with each other no matter what happens. But ít has to be sometime in the near future. Meanwhile, my siblings are being cruel to me, and I can't do anything, or even go out, without them saying or bothering or even blackmailing me. So I'm in my room all the time I'm at home. I am really considering the fact of moving out. But I don't know what to do, because I know that if I move out, problems with my first cousin and I will grow, and my family will take matter into their own hands. Can you guys give me advice into what to do?? Stay at home and deal with them, and their blackmailing or move out?
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male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (15 January 2011):
 One of the points I always raise when people ask about cousin relationships is the effect on the family. Sounds like you're living that consequence.
If this relationship is important to you it sounds like your only choice is to move out. You're in effect being made to choose between your mother & siblings vs. your cousin. You're an adult, you can make that decision. And to be honest, unless there's something to this beyond the fact that you're cousins (like they think he's a bad person or something), it sounds like a pretty toxic place to be living regardless.
There's quite a number of states where cousin marriage is illegal -- you'll want to figure out what the law is in yours.
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