A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Sometimes, I don't know what to do without being a beotch to my daughter's dad. If I'm being mean to him it makes him want me more but if I'm being nice, it's like I've done something wrong. To make a long story short, I've been in and out of relationships with my daughter's dad. We've talked on numerous occasions about starting over, start fresh...keep the past in the past. He expects me to give him back his rights after giving them up. Why would I give it back to him? There is no reason to that. I tell him my answer and now, he doesn't want to talk to me because of that. It's back and forth. Not only that, he keeps bringing up the past. We are agreed to starting fresh but how can we if he keeps coming in and out of our lives? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your advice. My daughter just turned two years old. She would ask me if "Daddy" is coming? I just changed the subject. When she gets to the stage where she knows/understand, I will tell her. Little things would remind her of her Dad. Like the color or the size of car, a man that looks like her Dad or her sister, etc. It's really hard.
My daughter saw me crying one night and she came over and wiped my tears asking me,"Why you crying, Mommy?". That just made me cry even more.
A
female
reader, Oddball.x  +, writes (10 December 2007):
 I think either you should just block him out completely, talk to your daughter about it or remain friends with him and dont let the past ruin anything.The past is the past and if he tries to bring it up, just tell him to change the subject.But overall, talk to your daughter first and see how she feels.x
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