A
female
age
51-59,
*weetiebabes
writes:Dear Aunts and Uncles,I would like to seek for your advice if it is a right thing to do.My LDR boyfriend and I of 4 yrs separated 4 months ago. Our love that I used to believe was not really a love at all but was just a mere fantasy. He used to help monetarily in times of my emergency needs and it summed up to 4500USD. I want to repay him the money for I realized he doesn't love me. He was just with me for physical reasons and I feel he gave those monetary funds for he was getting what he wanted from me...I feel so degraded. I got a new job offer now in Africa more than what I am getting here in Middle East and I can repay him. Is it right to pay him back? I feel this is not about immaturity but about principles...my principles.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2010): I'd pay him back too. If for nothing else than to just have him completely out of your life and no depths.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2010): If there was an agreement to pay him back, including an understanding, even if implied or inferred, to get it back to him when you can, then you should.
If he ever said it is a gift, and don't ever bother giving it back, then forget about it.
The number one thing is: if your conscience is nagging you to give it to him, do it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2010): If you think he used you for physical reasons and gave you money to do so, then surely the only way to prove this isn't the case it to pay him back. If you keep the money then you must be happy with this arrangement. I think if you are the bigger and more mature person then you will pay him back. Then you will never have to feel indebted to him. If you don't pay him back then if you think he gave you money for sex then....he did, didn't he.
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