A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've found out my partner has joined an internet dating site, he has said it was just a bit of fun and did it when we went through a bad patch and hasn't been on-line for a while which ties in with what his profile tells me. I've forgiven him but how do I forget the message he sent to one of the girls profiles? I'm torturing myself obsessing about it, I just want to move on now, but where do I start without going insane?
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice, I spoke to him and asked him to delete his profile in front of me which he did without question, and keeps telling me how sorry he is now, I told him he'd completely destroyed my confidence in us and he said it was his responsibility to rebuild us as it was him who'd ruined what we had. I'm still finding it so, so hard to stop thinking about it but I am feeling a bit better about the relationship
A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (11 January 2008):
 Hi,
it is very suspicious. Not everyone who goes through a rough patch starts chatting up girls on the internet. Its just not on.
But if you are certain he has stopped you should be able to work this out, he owes you some deep and meaningful reassurance that he won't do this again. And that's the key if you go through a rough patch again Im sure you are going to think he's going to do it all over again. You need his reassurance that this won't happen.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Dawnie +, writes (10 January 2008):
 I can imagine this is very hard for you. He said he did it when you were going through a rough patch, and you know he is not doing it now.Thats what you need to keep reminding yourself, he sounds as though he is being honest, which is good. You both need to focus on your relationship and if you go through another bad patch, communicate, but make it clear to him that if he acts in this way again its over.
Trust is a very important part of a relationship and so is fidelity without that there is no point in being together. Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2008): I've been in the same situation.You can't trust him.i moved out and never looked back.Their up to no good if their emailing other women on these sites.A man wants a pair and a spare.
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