A
female
age
36-40,
*issie86
writes:hi all, i have been with my partner for 3 years we used to have sex regularly, now its once a week if i'm lucky, but i have looked through his phone and our computer and found he has been watching porn. i am a little hacked off at this because he got me why would he need to watch porn i don't watch porn wen i feel horny!! i try it on with him and get turned down!! i have a sex drive too, while he's watching his porn and getting off on that what bout me? so p****d off at the moment i keep on telling him bout porn n says he hardly wants sex with me anymore i dont mind him watching it now and again but there comes a point where i think he knows i tryed it on last night and he watches that to get off on? i'm so upset and thinks he don't love me anymore maybe its time i packed my stuff and went home i have not been touched since last friday and does he not think i want sex but instead he goes and watches that rubbish..... x
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2012): While it can be frustrating, maybe you should try including porn when you are having sex! I know at first I was upset when my boyfriend was watching porn a lot but honestly, hes not with other girls, having sex with them, hes just watching porn. Men are so visual so sometimes it helps to have a little something extra. Sometimes when my boyfriend and I have sex, we will put porn on and watch it together the whole time just to spice things up a little bit! Try watching together! You may have a whole new experience!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2012): I would be so done with that behavior. Cut that guy loose if he is putting porn before you and your intimacy together...he is a lazy lover and very selfish.
If he is not willing to discuss it with you and he is not willing to make some changes, unfortunately this is not going to get better...he "might" have a porn addiction that he can't get out of.
You want better for yourself and the man you are in a relationship with, don't settle and allow him to get away with this. He is out of line and you are right...there is no reason for porn usage when he has you in his life...he is missing out on something far better then the trash he is into...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2012): A lot of people have this problem, it's upsetting. It upset me whem my boyfriend did it when I wasn't there. Just try talk to him more. My first boyfriend was a porn addict he managed to get rid of the stuff after a while. It's not you it's him with the problem.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2012): It can feel very insulting when a partner turns away from you to watch porn instead. Maybe he is hooked on it. Porn is a bit like fast food, bad for you in large quantities but for lazy lovers who prefer to masturbate it is easier than having regular sex with a partner. You could try watching porn with him and see if you can reap the results of him getting horny that way. But if it actually takes porn to get him interested in you at all, then he has a major problem. You could also try pepping things up in the bedroom with role play, toys etc but that to me would feel like rewarding his bad behavior! I would sit him down for a heart to heart. Try and reason with him. Explain you dont mind him watching porn now and again but it is affecting your relationship now, so he has a decision to make! You or porn. If his sexual interest in you doesnt improve and he keeps choosing porn after you have told him straight! Then you need to think about moving on because he is not worthy of you.
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