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female
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anonymous
writes: I need help. Im 14 years old. My mum and dad always argue. Its really derressing me. Its like they hate each other. My mum tried to tell my dad how she felt, but that made it worse.Please dont tell me its their problem, cos I'm getting dragged into it now too. I love them both, and dont want to take sides. Please Help .x. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2006): My parents ARE always arguing, they NEVER EVER get along anymore. In fact, as I type this, my dad completely exploded @ my mom AGAIN for the millionth time cos supposedly she wasn't LISTENING to him, but hey, he never seems to listen to us either & we can't do anything about it. Yes, the majority of arguments are started by my dad; he just has an EXTREMELY bad temper. He's never hit my mom or anything tho, but he always says stuff to put her down & I feel a lot of time he hates me & my sister too but he just absolutely LOVES my brother. It does get sickening but I'm getting used to it now. Not that he really DOES hate me, just that I feel that way a lot. I just don't think he (or even my mom @ times) knows how to raise teenagers, they don't understand we're not babies anymore.
A
male
reader, marcezs08 +, writes (31 August 2006):
hey my parents fight all the time, and my mom yells at everyone for everything, i used to be like u and would mind everything they say now i just dont care anymore..., but it if really depresses u, u should find something to cheer u up, maybe u can talk to ur best friends or something like that
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A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (31 August 2006):
 My parents used to scream at each other when I was a teenager...well it was my mother doing the ranting most of the time. My husband's family were the same. Both sets of parents are still together years later so don't think their arguments will lead to divorce as it is not inevitable. You must talk to someone about how you are feeling who is neutral (i.e. not your parents). That could be a best friend, a teacher, a school counsellor. In the meantime, just keep out of the way when they are yelling at each other and put your headphones on. If either of them try to bring you onto 'their side' don't get dragged into it.
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A
female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx +, writes (31 August 2006):
 It must be so hard for someone to have to see their family splitting apart like this, especially when it feels like there's nothing you can do. They are probably going through a hard time at the moment but are still being very inconsiderate and unfair to do this in front of you. It doesn't set a good example of what a good relationship is and, in a few years, they'll wonder why you have no idea how to make a relationship work!
I think you need to take your mum aside and talk to her. Tell her you can't live like this anymore and things need to be sorted. Either they split up or sort out their problems. I know it will be hard, seeming to tell your parents how to live their lives, but they have to know how much this is hurting you and it's no good for either of them either.
Maybe they want to stay together for your sake. Tell her that is not necessary. Everyone in this situation can be happier if they just bite the bullet and split up, or go to counselling and work on their problems.
You must speak to them and, if they don't listen, I'd say go and stay with a family member until it all calms down, that should shock them into realising how much they are hurting you with all this rowing.
Good luck
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A
female
reader, angel frm above +, writes (31 August 2006):
 Hiya hun,I know what you are goin through my mum and step dad went through a stage were they was always arguing. It will end in a couple of days. Don't worry. All they are doing is gettin rid of all the bottled up anger that has been building up for a while. They dont hate each other, it is normal for a couple to argue it wudnt be normal if they didnt argue. I no it isn't nice when they are arguing but what i do is just go in my room put some chilling music on and wait for it to die off, don't let them drag you into it. You don't have to take sides. Also what you should do is sit them down together and tell them how you are feeling tell them it is depressing you and that should make them realise that it isnt fair on any one for them to keep arguing especially when your around.Don't worry they will understand and you telling them what they are doing to you will make them realise that it has to stop.xx
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