A
male
age
51-59,
*ayray72
writes:Should I leave my online GF of almost 3 years, after finding out she is married just a few months ago? she has 2 children at home,and she can't really talk or email because her husband is around,and we haven't spoke by phone since January,and not a peep in 4 days time.I feel like a fool at times because I'm always reaching out and inquiring about her.She answers text maybe once a week if I'm lucky, I'm trying not to be a bad guy and aggrevate the already difficult situation??
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (20 April 2015):
 I think she saw you as "fantasy" or "escapism" from boredom, she most likely enjoyed your attentions and affections, but since it was long distance so she found someone closer by to day and the "play relationship with you online"
WHAT she did was wrong ON so many levels.
She should have had the COMMON decency to end it with you BEFORE starting to date someone else.
I played an online MMO and one of the younger male players had an "online GF" who lived halfway across the globe. But he would support her financially and emotionally - he even paid for a breast-augmentation (boob job) so she could get a better job. (basically he helped her get a stripper job without really understanding) We all told him, if she REALLY care about you, then she will WANT to visit you, or you visit her and she won't mind if you stop sending her money and expensive gifts. Love isn't about money. And guess what? turns out she had SEVERAL "online BFs" paying all her bills. It know it broke his hear to find that out. But in the end he is WAY better off without her.
Cut the contact - this "game of hers" is over.
Next time you consider dating, fond someone local.
Good luck.
A
male
reader, rayray72 +, writes (20 April 2015):
rayray72 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for all of the responses, the heading of this question is not entirely accurate, it was left blank so as to have a randomly generated one thinking perhaps it could be edited if need be.this entire situation reflects how a person can pick and choose selective truths about their lives,and the emotional risks of being online for any given person.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (19 April 2015):
 I guess CMMP may be using the irony font today?
because I'm sure CMMP would not be suggesting you enter into a bigamous marriage ? She is already spoken for.
I think it best that you develop your social networks closer to home. Sadly this woman has been enjoying a fantasy relationship with you (and that is nor fair) as she knows it can only end in a breakup - either with you or with her husband.
This marriage must have been known about for some time before the wedding took place, yet she never thought to mention it earlier. That is really mean.
She has not been completely honest with you - she has lied by omission.
She left you emotionally the day she agreed to marry her now husband. She ceased to be available to you emotionally but she did not have the courage to be truthful to you and tell you that she was no longer a single available woman.
Think about her actions, could you ever trust such a woman to be honest with you, in the future?
you know you deserve better than this. I am sorry she led you on.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (19 April 2015):
Uhhh,I think you should marry her too, the way you'd take her from him is to have a more expensive wedding.
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A
male
reader, Karlos83  +, writes (19 April 2015):
 I'd have seen a red flag if a woman I'd been speaking to for nearly three years has never bothered to meet me. If I'd found out she was married with kids and she'd kept it from me all this time I can't say I'd be surprised, but I'd sure leave well alone and not give her the time of day again. That's just me though.
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A
male
reader, rayray72 +, writes (19 April 2015):
rayray72 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for the comments!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2015): Personally I know this situation is not so cut and dried . I'm in a very similar situation with the man I love being overseas and i am in a relationship here now. I would love nothing more than to give it a go with this other man and start a life with him but I was really doubting his seriousness about me. He told me he would come here but never did and I doubt he would have . I am in the relationship here because we are relatively well suited and he is AVAILABLE to me yet given the choice I would be with the man overseas My heart aches everyday and I still dream of a day when we can be together but it seemed entirely up to me and I have children here who I see regularly . His freedom to come here was much greater but the truth is , don't think he would have.He cut me off after hearing that I'm with this other man and now I have to accept that and just deal with the pieces. so it's not always so cut and dried If you love her, tell her that there is no future whilst she is with another man.If she says she loves you and wants you too?Damn well get to her! Somehow , anyhow . Make it happen that you two are together . Fight for the love But if she wants him, then yes ? You need to just step back.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2015): Are you kidding? Apparently, you've never met this woman in person.
Well, now you know she's married. Perhaps if her husband gave you a punch in the nose; you'd realize you can't maintain a relationship with a married-woman.
Cut-off all contact, get out there and find someone local and available; and be careful about online relationships. If they make excuses never to meet you, it's a total scam!!!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 April 2015):
Jeeez are you seriously questioning of you should END it?
She already did. SHE MUST have been dating him while being your "online GF" - so OBVIOUSLY she didn't take your relationship very serious.
She is just using YOU for entertainment and if you support her with money/affection/attention.
STOP wasting your time on this woman. BLOCK her and move on.
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