A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:dear agony aunt...im a 17 year old girl. i have an online friend since the last one and a half year. we used to very attached to each other. and were the closest friends. but since the last couple of months since he has started dating this other girl ,he has changed dramatically. he is very arrogant, annoying and says stuff that actually hurts.. now i dont mention it to him because i just want him to be himself with me . but aftr all this i realised that i was letting him do that at my expense.and what hurts most is he doesnt even realise or doesnt seem to care.i stopped talkin to him a couple of times but somehow we got talking again because he scrapped or called me... and i dont like being rude to him. now i dont know what to do . his arrogance is getting to me and i cant stand him . but i cut him out of my life either because i've had so much of him in da last year that he has kind of become a part of my day . please tell me what. if i have to get rid of him please tell me how .?! coz i dont want the respect gone.
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female
reader, tayalouise  +, writes (10 October 2008):
 I understand your problem, obviouly this person you feel you were close to has changed and you want to know why.
The girlfriend has had a big effect on him and it doesn't sound like he is the same person you were close with.
If its hurting you and then I would suggest to stay well away from him.
Maybe in a few months he could be back to normal and you can talk again, but at the moment it sounds like a bad idea.
Its best to tell him how you feel, and explain that you love being his friend but at the moment its hard because he is acting differently, and tell him its best that you don't talk for a while until he understands how he makes you feel sometimes.
You won't be being rude to him, you're only doing because he has treated you badly as a friend.
Good luck
T x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2008): Disrespect should not be tolerated He seems to think just because you are on the other end of the computer you have no feelings. I perceive from the post you have grown quite attached to him and are finding it hard to extricate yourself from the relationship.
the easiest way (there are no easy ways) is to gradually reduce the amount of contact you have with him read the e-mails but reply less Instant message less and if he is going to be rude hurtful (or abusive) cut him dead you are not being rude for in my book if he feels he has to abuse someone why should it be you.
You don't need to be impolite, tell him straight that you are offended and that you don't wish to be treated like that... you don't need to be a doormat to be kind and caring
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