A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:About 4 months ago I had a bit of a one night stand with a "friend" - who we shall call James. I say friend very loosely though, we have only met eachother about 4 or 5 times through a mutual friend - who we shall call Darren. It was the most amazing one night stand ever - didn't have sex, but had everything but sex. He made me feel wanted and made me feel womanly. However, after that we never really spoke again. I sent him a message on facebook and he never replied. I also sent him a friend request to which he never replied. However, darren and james had a bit of a problem lately which they were both involved it, which I helped them out with it. I cant go in to details of the problem, but it was big and I basically sorted it all out for them because of my close friendship with Darren. And now the guy I had the one night stand with; James, left a message on my voicemail basically saying "hey, would be good to catch up... phone me back."What is going on? Darren has said that he thinks that because we were both drunk during the one night stand, James has felt a bit awkward and bit disgraced and thats why he never replied to me after the one night stand. I have been feeling likewise to be honest - wish I hadnt been drunk, wish I had been more dignified, blah blah blah. But now James is wanting to get back in touch - what do I do? Do I return his call or just forget about him?
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drunk, facebook, one night stand Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2008): Guys generally don't feel disgraced and ashamed after a one night stand. He probably just wants to see if you can have another round of meaningless sex. But don't take my word for it.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2008): This happened to me too before. The guy called me about 1 year later and he straight up told me that him & his girl split and he needed sex. So I would be weary of him just wanting some. What does him & your friend's relationship have to do with wether or not he talks to you? And he outright ignored your attempts to contact him, twice. That would make me think twice.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (7 February 2008):
 Hi,
yeah contact him, why not? For a start he probably didnt get back to you because of your relationship with the guy who he fell out with. Now that's patched up he's back looking for you, that's no coincidence.
But one thing, you are past the one night stand thing, make sure he is aware that you are not a one night stand type of girl and want to develop a friendship before you sleep with each other. It's the easiest way to find out if the guy is genuine. But I reckon you have nothing to lose. So go for it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2008): Contact him, take things easy and make sure you don't sleep with him. That way you will know he wants you for you and not just for sex.
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