A
female
age
41-50,
*E33
writes: Iam 33 years old and am married to a 65yr old man.My problem is he's very restrictive,won't let me go any where.I like clubbing but he won't let me go and when I tell him to go with me he says he doesn't want and that kills me.Two, we can only do sex maybe once in a month and the answer he gives me is he's tired everyday.I really feel every thing is so boring and I don't want to cheat on him.What should I do?Leave him?But I have his child.Iam confused
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female
reader, ME33 +, writes (13 December 2012):
ME33 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks every one for your help.Really found every ones answer useful and I think I know where to start now.Now to answer some of yo questions,one asked me if I ask for sex at different times?Yes,and on diffent days including the weekends when he's home and not working but the same reason he's giving me HE IS TIRED.
Another person asked me if I ask to go clubbing without him?No I ask to go with him,or with his kids if he doesn't wanna go but he says NO.Going out shopping I only go with his kids cze wre almost the same age.Dinner I have to go with him.The only outting he thinks he's taking me for if not dinner once in a while is to the stores.Again Thanks y'all
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 December 2012):
 Do not stay with someone just because you have a child with them.
I agree with SAGEOLDGUY that kids are very adaptable.
You want different things than your hubby does.
You want sex more frequently... do you ask at different times of the day? I prefer morning sex.. hubby prefers night time... we tend to miss each other a lot because of that.
A lot of men in their 60s and older have an easier time with erections in the morning... so perhaps switching to mornings will mean he's not so tired...
My bigger concern is that you say he's restrictive and won't let you go out without him... does this mean you can't go shopping or to dinner with a gf? OR is he just not letting you go clubbing without him (personally I agree with that)
the key is you want something he does not... the marriage is not going to survive.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (10 December 2012):
 Don't worry about the child. Kids are very adaptable....
Decide if YOU want to live your life like a Nun. IF you do, then stay where you are and let the "status quo" be the "status."
IF you want to have a REAL LIFE.... like many women of their early 30s might think is typical.... get away from your husband and get on with YOUR life.....
P.S. I suspect that he will be too tired to realize that you have left him.... and will CERTAINLY be too tired to go out and look for where you have gone!!!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2012): What can I say? This is a downside to an age difference. One person is bound to show all the signs of getting old and wearing out quicker than the other. I always say to people planning to get into a relationship or marriage to someone much older than them, to consider all of the pros and cons before making the final decision.
I know its a tough decision to make when there's a child involved, but If you're not happy with this life you have with your husband, its time to sit down and have a serious talk with him about the problem and possible solutions.
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