A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:So i have a new boyfriend. We started dating last week, and theres a little something im curious over. How should i take it that he doesn't like PDA? I told him i understood, that i also didn't like making out n public (school). I talked to him for awhile and how i'd like him to prove to me that he wants to be with me. ( of course not demanding, just gentle) However im that kind of person who loves being hugged...do i tell him that? I also told him how'd i like to come up to him, hug him and give him a kiss, and he said i could do that. But for some reason i feel a little weird making the 1st moves lol.Especially since hes standing with his friends. What do you think? Should i try it out? And see what his reaction is? Its not like hes ashamed to be with me, its just his personality i guess, to not be all "touchey touchey " in public. I suggested for us to hang out,(outside of school) and he was all for it. =)Thanks for any advice/ suggestions you may have 3 Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhe broke up with me last week..bc he felt that we were just different. All having to do with this. He said hes not the boyfriend for me, and how i deserve to be with someone who i can be completely comfortable with and really enjoy being in their presence. He also said that he just isnt that type of bf to be all cuddling.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (13 October 2011):
 yeah i'd be subtle... walk up to him and quietly take his hand and give it a little squeeze... no need to be so showy in public.
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A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (13 October 2011):
 I'm not one for public displays of affection either so I can understand your boyfriend's dislike of it.
Hugging and/or kissing him in front of his friends or any other large group would be forcing him into the spotlight and I don't think he'd like that. He may not be as demonstrative in return and that would leave you both feeling uncomfortable. Instead experiment with more subtle displays and with fewer people around. He may gradually come to like it.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (13 October 2011):
 Kudoos to your bf for being a reserved type. I live close to a couple of high schools and I am forever eschewing and bumping into teenage couples twisted together in knots like snakes during mating season. Not that it bothers me, but tbh neither thrills me, after a while it's like : Ok, ok, you luuuuv each other, we got it, now why don't you guys go get a room somewhere.
Some people are very physical and touchy-feely, some are not and that does not mean at all that they are not capable of feelings, emotions and passion, just that they express it better in private. As always, the best is to try and reach a compromise, because if you are the affectionate type you don't want to feel stifled, so nothing wrong in taking the initiative, gently, occasionally, and not obsessively, maybe he is just shy and needs your encouragement to loosen up. But, remember, occasionally ; moderation is the key, you don't want always to jump on top of him like an overeager Saint Bernard puppy, because this may get VERY annoying for anybody and more so for a withdrawn/reser4ved type.
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