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female
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anonymous
writes:Hope someone can help. My mom is in the final stages of alzheimers disease and recently we had to move her from the retirement side of her seniors home to the nursing home side. This has hit me hard. I am normally a strong girl but have been breaking down in tears all over the place lately. This is moms eighth year with alzheimers and I thought I was ok..obviously not. Has anyone been through something similar and how did you deal with it? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your informative, caring and sweet answers.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): Hi, my name on here is phiatiger if you want to PM me.
I have previously read alot of research about this terrible disease and I really do feel for you. I am currently awaiting results for my nan as other family members believe that she may have Alzheimers. Therefore we have in common that I am dealing with the early stages and you with the final ones.
Both you and your mother are scared. If you can be comforted by the fact that as a mother she just wants YOU to be okay. Talk to her and others where you can and releive yourself of some of the pressure.
As for crying all the time - who wouldn't, you have dealt with this for 8 long years.
I don't know how much information and support the staff at the nursing home have given you but they are there to support you not just deal with your mom. Read up as much as possible on the disease, learn the ins and outs of the final stages so that you can prepare yourself and support your mom as much as possible. Make sure she knows that you love her dearly but are finding it hard, Altzheimers patients are aware of more than we credit them, they may not be aware in the mind but they can read the universal language of energy. So do your best to send her loving energy, strong energy, especially when you are weak, when she looks at you confused show her your biggest smile. She will know its hard and she will know she has a one in a million daughter. x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2008):
I went through the same with my Dad, my best friend and in the end, he became my son. It will be hard but talk to her, the hearing is the last to go. She may not respond but she hears you. Bring your clergy to pray for her. Play her favorite music, sing to her, it will make her feel safe when she has clarity, and is scared. Buy her 2 soft small stuffed animals place in her hands, in case she may want something to squeeze. Have everyone that she loves and that loves her come to see her. At the end, you will know. If you can tell her it is ok and she can go home to her mom and dad, they are waiting for her. When I told my dad that, he spoke for the first time in 4 weeks and said I know when.
My last moment with my dad I prayed the Hail Mary and the our Father, I than called out to my grandmother and told her he is ready, after I said that he took his last breath, and I knew he felt whole and safe again.
Remember you are not alone. God is with you.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2008): I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I find that talking about a problem is always helpful, especially in a situation where there's not much you can do to help it. Talk to your friends, significant other, your religious leader, your dad, and anyone who you trust and is willing to be kind and listen. Counselors are absolutely amazing listeners, if you can afford it, and they can really help you out when the sadness is just overwhelming. And don't be afraid to cry; I can't imagine anyone *not* crying in such a situation.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2008): I'm so sorry, honey.Maybe if you gave us your age we could be a little more helpful? You could be a messed up teen or a middle aged woman!
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