A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hiim facing a vry big problem ryt nw n im vry devastated at this point n hav no idea what to do...:'(my mom found out about me having sex with a boyfriend..i really love him alot...nw my mom says she hates him alot n wil never let me be wit him...i wana marry him n i cnt imagine living my life without him...im so hurt..i pleaded for a 2nd chance for him..but mum says she will never forgive him n wants me 2 stop toking to him....my bf doesnt wana meet me nw cuz he says he wants my mum to knw tat he isnt sucha bad guy.....itz never evr gonna happen nw..nt gonna make d mistke of having sex again....cnt imagine my life without him....me n my boyfriend did make the mistake of having sex but it just happend :'(my mum has lost trust in me..i do tok 2 my bf ovr the phn but i never meet him nwdays til mum realizes he aint a bad guy....n my mum doesnt knw i tok 2 him ovr the phn.....i do nt know wat to do....im so lost...cant live without my boyfriend....cant evn imagine it......my boyfriend is very hurt that my mum now has a vry bad image of him set up in her mind...he always wanted to meet my mom but nw he says after her finding out bout all this....he doesnt hav d courage to face her in the future n my mum wil never ever wana c his face...she thinks that he used me just for his own satisfaction n bcuz he wants my money...its nt like tat as i knw him vry well....im in a very bad situation....i need to be with my boyfriend and also want my mom to forgive and love my boyfriend....please help me........ :'(
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female
reader, haanz92 +, writes (12 April 2010):
thnx 4 replyin :)
im 18 yrs old...my bf has never borrowd money 4m me but since he is not o my standards,mum thinks he dates me cuz of my money...mum n me hav had loads of fights reg me requesting her to forgive him....but she told me she will break off all the ties i hav wit my family...i m 4m a religious and conservative family...tats y my family is against ne gurls having guy frnds....
my mum thinks that he takes advantage of me wenever my parents are nt arnd....cuz of this im nt able to live happily....till mum forgives him...but its nt happening n i hav no idea if she wil ever forgiv him n accept him....i cant leave my mother but i wana b wit hte love of my life...he is very guilty bout having sex wit me....cuz in our family it is considered a sin.....i dunno wat 2 do.....im trying 2 let the situation kool dwn.....but its veyr difficult 4 me 2 bear d fact that my mum knws ive lost my virginity n hav spent nights wit him...he feels guilty but mum doesnt wana spk nemre bout him as she hates him...
im realli upset...plz help me frnds...
A
female
reader, EbonyBlossom  +, writes (10 April 2010):
 For a start, you are 18 (at least), so you are an adult and your Mum cannot tell you what and what not to do. Sounds like you really love him and you don't regret sex with him for any reason other than your Mum. As long as the sex was protected then I don't see that you've made any mistake. Ask your Mum why she doesn't like him and why she can't give him a chance to get to know him before making such decisions. However you did say he uses your money. Why is this? I mean, everyone lends their partner money or borrows from their partner from time to time, but how often does he borrow from you and what for? Does he pay you back?
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