A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I started going out with one of my closest friends at the start of last year and I was so happy. I loved him so much. Unfortunatly, he left me after 9 months whilst I was on holiday. I was so devastated and it put me in a really bad place, and my mum and dad were furious with him. When I got back 2 weeks later, we met up at his house and did stuff and then he asked me back out and obviously, as I was still in love with him I said yes. We only went out for 3 weeks as he didnt make any effort at all to see me and he just didnt care at all. We stayed friends and it was just like old times. We didn't stop talking and we stayed up on the phone every night for hours. It was like we were still a couple. He'd tell me about his life and I'd tell him about mine.That went on for about three months... Then about 3 weeks ago he told me he liked me again but this time it was more so than before. I wasn't over him either and really did still like him. Our phone calls just made me love him more.And on new years eve, he asked me out again and I said yes.He has changed so much from the last time I know its only been a week but we've seen each other loads and he sends me cute paragraphs to wake up to and I'm so happy when I'm with him. But my mum still doesn't know we are going out and she really dislikes him. And I have to lie to her and say I'm going out with my friends when really I'm meeting up with him. I don't know what to do...I really dont want to break up with him as he really is my 'true love' and I'm so happy when I'm with him but I don't know how to turn my mum's opinion of him. I love my mum but I really am so happy with my boyfriend.What should i do?
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female
reader, MyDaysOnceRevolvedAroundYou +, writes (6 January 2013):
 Look, your parents hate to see you sad and anybody that hurts their child hurts them just as much back because you are a part of them both. You think they don't already know your seeing this guy if you are up all night on the phone to him anyway though? Of course they do, your phone calls never fall on deaf ears when you live with your parents.If you are happy sweetheart, then your parents may be weary of this guy for a while but they will eventually come to terms with it.. It isn't like he's beaten you up, he was just a kid going through a stage of not knowing what exactly he wanted by the sounds of it.Its best to be open with them, bring him over and explain that you are back together and that you both want to be honest and open about the whole relationship, this will earn him more respect than sneeking behind their backs.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2013): totally agree with fatherly advice, it isn't the most healthy relationship being on and off and him one minute wanting to be with you then changing his mind when it suits himyour mum just doesn't want to see you hurt, you're very young and at the moment you may think he's your true love but if he loved you he wouldn't treat you like that, and that is why your mum doesn't approvei was in your position when i was your age, my mum couldn't stand him because we were on and off and all i did was cry but he didn't make amends with her and if i had to choose it would be my family everytime, because i realised if he loved me he would want to get on with themyou need to be honest with your mum and your boyfriend needs to make amends with her and prove that he loves you and hes going to treat you better and right!
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice  +, writes (6 January 2013):
 Parents are protective, that's what we do. Your parent's have seen you hurt and suffering and they don't have that warm hormonal rush to help them forget. Time and open honesty are the best ways to turn y9our mom's opinions of him. It also wouldn't hurt for him to personally apologize to your parents for what he put you through.
Additional advice for you. Playing the go away, come back game, can be a manipulative tool for people in a relationship. It is rather cruel and abusive. You need to be sure of his intentions. The world is full of people who think that their abusive partner is their true love. You need to keep a watch out for other abusive or cheating behavior.
FA
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