A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:My mum and I have very different figures, she's got a small bum, and thin legs, and no chest, whereas I've got a large bum and larger thighs, small waist and large bust. However, I'm happy with my body. I like having a more womanly shape, however my mum doesn't seem to like this. She's constantly going on about how pleased she is to have her small bum and thin legs, and once even said she was pleased not to have my bum and legs. Little comments, like the other day we were out shopping, and I saw a thick jumper/dress, and pointed it out to her, she said she didn't like it as it would cover her bum, but then added that I should get it at I should want to cover mine up. I'm annoyed at this, because I'm not fat. I've got a flat stomach, and very little weight on my hips, and I'm just made in a more hour-glass figure. However, my mum just can't seem to accept this..Any help? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, bby_gal06 +, writes (29 October 2006):
 hiya
i think your mum is jealous of you having a more womenly shape and just seems to put you down hoping that you will change it.
lads like more womenly shape especially perk bums and bust so she might think of it in that way but she could also be jealous about you being younger and being able to have more fashion than her and look better than her in clothes.
you should sit down to your mum and say to her how you are feeling she is annoying you with it if your happy the way you are so should she be.
my mum is abit like yours but once i spoke to her and said that i am happy she began to stop it because she didnt like the fact i was taking it to heart.
try talkin this should help!!
good luck x x
A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (29 October 2006):
 Your mother is getting older and she sees you having developed from a child into a beautiful young woman. She probably feels a little envy. Perhaps the best way to handle things is to make a bit of a joke about the whole thing - if she makes comments just laugh them off...say I wouldn't want 'bee sting boobs' like you or 'thank goodness I didn't inherit your flat bum genes'. She may not realise she hurts your feelings or maybe she doesn't care as it makes her feel better - whatever the situation, as long as you are happy with yourself then your mothers opinion is irrelevant.
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A
female
reader, Toria +, writes (29 October 2006):
 I think it's time to talk to her and be honest, everyone has a different shape and it's great you like your figure as there are many women out there that don't and would do anything to change parts of it.
You need to tell her that you are happy with your figure and that her constant comments are making you feel you shouldn't be when surely as your mum she should encourage you to love and respect who you are and what you look like.
Good luck :o)
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A
female
reader, xLEAHx +, writes (29 October 2006):
 Hi Anon,
I think it may be a bit down to jealousy,if your mum is quite trendy for her age,she's probery getting paranoid about her ageing and the way she looks..i can understand why your getting anoyed at this because it sounds as if she's not giving you the confidence you might need and in a way putting you down..its good that your happy with the way you are and the way you look and thats why she's proberly doing this..prehaps she maybe consious of the way she looks and she doesn't like the fact that your happy with your body..i'd take no notice the main thing is if your happy with the way you look then ignore her remarks..if anything your mum should be praising you and be proud of the way you look and giving you confidence.
xLEAHx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2006): Hi Anon, This must be knocking your confidance,
but I am sure she doesnt meen to, some Mums admittedly mine at times and my Nan,(diffrent genrations)Are so blunt about body shape because they think nothing of it they think there just expessing there opinan, you are perfectly happy with yourself anyway and you should be Its great to have curves and a flat stomach (Im working on it too.)
If your Mum is very slim she will think you should be the same, but thats wrong you sound healthey and unfortuntly these are where eating disorders start, so you keep being happy with yourself and if she persists judging your figure you will have to let her know that its hurting you and knocking your confidance,Dont change for anyone you have a healthey attatude and a lovely inner confidance and thats admireable in a person and lads love that! Take Care, xx
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