| A
male
,
anonymous
writes: Hi, I'm a 15 year old boy. Last year there was this girl I really liked. But because I couldn't talk to her without laughing and because I told my mates that I thought about her all the time they told her and said I'd said I had kissed her, so she freaked and was angry at me and never comes again. But I cleared my mind of it and then yesterday me and my mate were in the town and I saw her and I just remebered how much I liked her and wanted her. So, how can I rebuild the gaps? How can I get her to like me? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2005): Talk to her, without laughing of course, and tell her that what your mates said to her were lies. Then talk to her and eventually build up a relationship with her.
A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (2 September 2005):
 The first thing you need to do is to clear the air. She's been labouring for almost a year under the misapprehension that you lied about kissing her. She might be really embarrassed about that, or she might be annoyed, or - here's the best bit - she might have gotten over it by now.
Speaking as a woman, I'd strongly suggest the direct approach. You walk past where she is, catch her eye, remind her who you are (in case she's well and truly over it) and ask if you can talk to her for a minute. Be pleasant. Smile. Tell her that you want to apologise to her for a lie that your mates told, thinking that they'd be funny.
Then basically, I'd suggest you lay it out for her - the brief version - just like you did in your question. Because you were shy, you couldn't talk to her without laughing and you didn't know how to stop your mates saying that you'd said you'd kissed her. Tell her that you're sorry that their joke got out of hand and that you felt bad that she freaked. Ask if she understands. Ask if you can be friends.
No matter what she feels right now about the incident that happened last year, I promise you that she'll be impressed that you thought to apologise for it, even though it wasn't directly your fault.
Once she understands that you didn't say what she was told you said, you're then free to start taking small steps towards spending more time with her. You can stand around outside school and talk with her and ask her if she'd like to hang out some Saturday, etc.
Don't feel like you have to overwhelm her with attention, just because you like her. You can make very tiny gestures, like texting her "thinking of u" messages, or smiling at her across a room. Believe me, these kinds of things are monumental to girls and you'll shortly know whether she returns your affection.
Good luck!
...............................
|
