A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been through so many things that have made me angry and sad recently, and in the midst of all this, I've always had my faith, but now I'm losing that.If God is real, then why did I get cursed with singleness?Ever since I was a young teenager, I prayed to God to send me a beautiful and kind man to make a husband to me. I dreamed of showering him with all the love in my heart. I dreamed about dedicating "Over the Hills and Far Away" to him and playing and singing it for him on the guitar. I dreamed of reading with him, and dancing barefoot in the garden, and looking up in the stars. I believed that God would grant me the desires of my heart, and now I feel so betrayed and disappointed.I'm in a career that I don't love, and I don't have anything in life to be a source of fulfillment. I'm a passionate person- I burn with passion and a fire inside- and there's no channel for all that passion, so it burns me from the inside. I cry myself to sleep at night, this is the reason I give when I break down and cry. I'll never know the joy of married happiness, and now I'm losing my faith, because I don't want to follow a God who can't even given me the desires HE put in my heart, and I don't know what to hold onto. I'm sick of crying myself to sleep at night. I am SICK of longing to play music in a band, but never getting to have that in my life. I'm sick of wishing I knew how to ride a horse, not just watch other people ride. I want fulfillment in life, I'm sick of starving on scraps. I'm sick and tired of going to bed clutching a stuffed wolf in my arms because I'm so lonely. I'm sick of watching cheaters and sluts walking away with good loving husbands, while I just get loneliness.If you have anything mean to say, then just don't bother responding, because I go through things every DAY that would make a grown man break down and cry.I only want words of encouragement, or answers. My life is a living hell right now. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2024): Anon #1, I'm so sorry that you are going through that.
You sound like an incredible person to be kind, in the midst of all that. I hope that your morning is coming soon, joy comes in the morning. Thank you for reaching out to me. It means so much to me.
Anon #2, thank you so much for reaching out to me. You put so much into that. I think those are great ideas.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2024): HiYour thoughts, dreams are lovely and I won't say unrealistic because I was lucky enough to experience meeting and joining with my soul mate for 20 years of complete love and passion.Today my life is hell because my life shattered into a million pieces, the day I watched my soulmate die in my arms. No pain or hell like it other than loosing a child, death and hell are close together. I am trying to say, I also questioned my faith how God could be so cruel and force me into my own hell, I lost my hope my dreams, my love, my identity, my home, my business, my mother six months before, my 19 year old wolf dog and now faced with a possible cancer diagnosis. I have come to acknowledge that when you loose! or don't have (in your case) there is nothing left other than Faith, and it is this faith that forces me up in the cold mornings, and makes me open my front door, makes me breath, because if I did not have faith then I am dead!I do sympathize with you and understand what you are saying and almost all of this love you have invested in your dream future is wasted or at least not appreciated by God.I think you have a 'calling' of faith and making sure your heart does not turn cold. Please don't let your heart turn cold, I have not let my flame die. You have still got potential to meet your true love in this life, I have not ( I am only approx couple of years older than you, I think). I know my faith tells me to carry on the journey through hell and not be feared or lost because one day we al will reunite with loved ones. So we are almost worlds apart in our living hells but you only have this earth to search/find/ mines the next life so i don't have an earthly hope or dream, all shattered.Continue been strong, brave, faithful, creative, passionate, and be grateful for health and know the pain you suffer although painful you must come out of this type of thinking and make changes that align with your inner truth.For example: you hate your job, time to change it then. If you need to study again to get a career to push you forward then enrol and work part time. If you want to be in a band, create your own and let others come into yours. If you need to learn music more tehre are plenty free or cheap study options online that you can do. If you feel lonley with little wolf, adopt a real dog. If you crave adventure make adventure, change your vision and dreams to fit what you want to materialize. Stop thinking hell and think heaven (I have too because that is where my love now resides).If you are healthy, then you have a ot of opportunities you can make to change your life for the better and this could be the way you actually meet and fall in love.If I can carry my pain of absolute devestation beyond words of soulmate loss you can carry an imaginary one, change your perception from victim to victory and wonder of the mystery of life that awaits you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2024): God is real but He does what He wants, not what we want. Imagine a child being denied too many sweets because they would ruin it's health. The parent cares for the child like God does.
There are many ways to suffer in life and we all get some suffering. Don't get me wrong, loneliness is very painful. But there are people who are in relationships and still lonely.
Why not take some horseriding lessons and advertise that you'd like to play in a band? Or if you don't play music already you could take some lessons. The new interests could take your mind off things and who know you might meet someone that way.
You don't say what you've already tried. In fact there are several problems in one here: loneliness, career, not doing things you want to do. What is holding you back? Do you think some counselling might help you look at any fears you might have about trying new things?
I guess there must be dating sites or similar where you could get to know someone of your own faith.
I hope you'll consider these options and become happier as a result.
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