A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I was in an online relationship for almost 4 years that has came to an end recently. The guy is in the US and I live across the other side of the world. We didn't get to meet but were very much deeply in love with each other. We're both still virgins. We had believed that we were meant to be soul mates despite the distance between us, but the thing is he has been really sick since the day we met, and recently he told me he's became really depressed as he could no longer see himself having a future. He broke up with me, but told me he still loves me but he can't be a good boyfriend at the moment as he thinks he cannot give me the things I need anymore. It breaks my heart still, because he had promised no matter what he would not let me go, and I meant the world to him and each time I think about the past, it brings tears to my eyes.I do really love him, and insisted that I didn't even care if he can't be a good boyfriend at all. Yet, he won't come back to me. I am very depressed now, as I had never loved anyone like I love him before, I still love him. There is a mutual feeling, but he said he does not want to bring me down by not being online much anymore and be there for him. (I had relied on him a lot for support) Just few hours ago, he had told me even if he did recover, he would be very busy with his new life at starting college and getting a job, and not come back to me - yet insisting he will never forget about me and said that what we had was not a mistake at all. And even if I was there physically with him, he wouldn't have time with me.I am really confused. He also said that maybe one day we'll be back, but 'we'll see'... I am very scared, and very sad right now. I don't know if I should continue hoping he would come back to me if I transfer my uni from Australia to the USA to study just to risk it for him. Because I am still madly in love with him... do we even still have the slightest chance? Will I ever find love again? We had been through a lot supporting each other even though it is without physically. I just don't want to lose his love and I pray everyday for his recovery and his return to me... Should I wait for him since he said he still loves me?...
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2008): I'd just ask you if you REALLY know everything there is to know about him? Are you sure you're not just living a fantasy? Did he see you as just a bit of fun whilst hiding behind the anonymity of the internet?
As for moving to the USA - don't be silly. You'd be a fish out of water for a start, and it sounds to me like he's had his bit of fun and is trying to distance himself from you now that you've 'fallen in love' and are getting serious.
Yes, you'll find love again, but try meeting someone in person. Someone on the other side of the world hiding behind a computer screen isn't really the best of propositions.
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