A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: I have been with my spouse for 15 years. We both have two boys from other marriages, his are 39 and 36 and mine are 28 and 26.The problem I have is his grown children, and his need to change everything we have together, in order to be with them.My spouse will cancel committments, and totally disregard my needs when they are around. Both children are not interested in many of the things my spouse and I enjoy, like going to Basketball, and Hockey games, so when they are around, we give our tickets away.There appears to be some need for my spouse to try to be a part of their lives, as they show little or no interest in his, other than his wealth.The children see this their father, and assume he will be doing anything they request, and indeed he does, without any discussion of thought of me.Any suggestions? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael +, writes (10 October 2010):
Both your children are growing or have grown up and must live their own lives as you two have lived yours. He needs to know that no matter how hard it is to let them go, he has to make them deal with their own problems, financially or emotionally, so they can be their own people. He has done his part as a parent already and now is the time to focus on his own life with you. Tell him that or show him this message if necessary so that he does not assume that it was through some hidden immorality that you made him think those things.
I hope that helps.
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